Learn Anything Faster With Limitless Author Jim Kwik

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Katie: Hello and welcome to the “Valence Mama Podcast”. I’m from Katie Valencia.com and Valencia.com, along with Valence from E, our new line of personal care products that works even better than their chemical substitutes. I’m excited about this episode, which is about how to upgrade your brain and learn something faster. And I’m here with a dear personal friend, Jim Quick. Yes, his real name is. And he is a globally recognized expert in improving memory, brain correction, and rapid learning. Her story is incredible. After a brain injury as a child, he gave up learning the challenge and was told by teachers that he had a “broken brain”. He devised a strategy to dramatically improve his mental performance and now he really The best in the world. Since then, he has dedicated his life to helping others develop their true abilities and mental strength. Like yesterday, he is the new host of the “Coke Brain” podcast and tomorrow, the day we record it, is the best-selling author of “Infinite” to upgrade your brain and bring extraordinary life. There is a book about unlocking. . His mission in life has left no brain behind.

And in this episode, they visit loneliness, to emerge strong from a crisis, to train yourself to learn anything quickly, and to find your sweet spot and inner potential. Provides some practical strategies. It’s always a wonderful experience with the gym. This is no exception. I know you will enjoy it as much as I did. So, without further ado, this is my dear personal friend, Jim Coke. Welcome to the best-selling author Jim Quick, podcast.

Jim: Katie, it’s great to be here. Thank you for keeping me. That’s fine – and thank you to everyone who listens.

Katie: I’m so excited to chat with you. I have known you personally for years and have been a fan of your work so far. And I think you have so much knowledge and so much to share, and I’m really excited about the direction we’re going to take today. To begin with, for anyone who missed your first episode, I’m sure you’ll find it in the show’s notes, but just tell us about your story. Let me tell you a little bit, and how you became today. .

Jim: Of course a lot of people call me a “brain coach”, which is interesting because it wasn’t my upbringing. If anything, my inspiration was really my disappointment. I suffered a traumatic brain injury at the age of five. In fact, in kindergarten class, I was very upset. And then, before that, my parents said, I was very excited, very curious and very playful, but then I stopped very much after my injury. And where he spoke the most in school, I had very slow processing, the teachers had to repeat themselves over and over again. I learned to play it and pretended I understood, but I didn’t really understand. I had poor attention span. It took me another three years to learn to read. I remember struggling on a particular day, slowing down a class when I was nine, and being teased by other kids in the class. And the teacher comes to my defense, but points to me and says, “This is a boy with a broken brain.” And although I think she was trying to explain that it was like a disability like mine, what I came out of was that label in my mind. I listened to it over and over again, and the label became my limit. And when I talk about being infinite, I use the metaphor “being in a box”. And I feel like that; you know, we all, in some areas of our lives, feel like we’re not progressing, and / or maybe we feel like we’re stuck. And I think that’s where it was imposed on me, and it affected everything from there, just with the learning challenges. Because every time I worked badly on a test, which was like every time, every time I wasn’t taken to sports, which was regularly beautiful, I always told myself that I was broken, you know, boy, broken brain

But at the age of 18 I was able to recover, and I got books and teachers that helped me balance my education. Before it got really bad; you know, before it got better it got even worse, where I was eating and not sleeping, I was so; I wanted to; my goal, really , To be proud of his parents. And they were not the parents of the lion. We emigrated; my father emigrated here to the United States when he was 13 years old. He had lost both his parents, and they could not afford to feed him, so he came to America to live with his aunt, whom I knew as my grandmother. And it was tough, you know? He had no money, no resources, no education, no language. We lived in the back of the laundromat where my mother worked. But I really was; you know, I wanted to sacrifice them, being the eldest of three children, siblings, I really wanted to be a good example. So I put a lot of pressure on myself, and that’s how I ended up hitting the wall in college. I thought that being a new floor, I could make a fresh start, and I would pull all those close by, and not eat or sleep because I wasn’t getting a grade, and to go There was a lot of money for school, which I didn’t have. And I ended up walking through the library, fell down the flight of stairs, hit my head again, I stood in the hospital two days later, and I just; I thought I was dead, and parts of me Wish; it was a very dark time.

And from there, though, through serenity, I made personal progress, I began to study adult learning theory, multiple intelligence theory, ancient memonics, memory methods that people used to print before they were pressed. Will use, I found reading faster. And it turned on the light switch for about six days, and I just started to see it. It was like night and day, and I started to focus better, I could keep my focus, I started to memorize what I read, and I started to understand what the professors were teaching, and I can help, and I can help other people. And one of my first students, she was fresh, she read 30 books in 30 days. Not a scheme or a scan, he actually read them, and they ended up; they were health and fitness books and he saved his mother’s life from terminal cancer. And when I got the news, I realized that if knowledge is power, then learning is our superpower, and I have dedicated my life for the last 28 years to help people unlock this superpower that we It is present inside everyone.

Katie: I like it. And I think that’s a great message, especially for kids. I know my kids love your work, too, and they’ve taken some of your courses with me. And I think Superhero Wording, especially for kids, is very special in connecting with them. And maybe, like you, I guess there are other kids in today’s world who weren’t told they had a broken brain, I don’t hope so, but ADD or ADH. D is labeled, or something like that; like, something of a nervous nature, and then they wear that label and they carry it with them. And ironically, I actually found out about a year ago that I had ADHD technically. And it’s ridiculous that if I had been diagnosed as a child, my life might have gone a little differently. But I think in reality, in your words, it has become a huge superpower, able to use it to its advantage. And that’s one of the reasons I like to talk to you, especially to listen to parents, because in particular; we know that the prices of all these things are going up, a lot of parents are visiting. Trying to figure out how to help and educate a child who likes ، who doesn’t have a broken brain, but whose brain is special, or whose brain is incredible Is? How do you support them? And that’s why I like your work.

So I’d like to start a little bit with this side and home schooling. Since I send my six kids to school, and when we started teaching them I tried to think about how you better prepare the world for kids we don’t really have. I don’t even know, maybe I know what it looks like as an adult. At this point and what are the skills that make them the most capable of growing up in any environment as adults? And we settled on things like creativity, critical thinking, the ability to learn quickly. And these are, in fact, the things you teach the world, and teach the CEO, and teach the actors and actresses, and that’s why I’d like to start there. How can we start preparing our children, especially now that so many people are going home unexpectedly in the last few months?

Jim: Definitely, I mean, it goes to the right of my book, which is called “infinite.” It’s all about upgrading your brain, learning something faster and opening up your extraordinary life. And I use the word “unusual” because when I was in elementary school I remember spending a lot of time at school with the neighborhood kids, or the stupid kids, because people were labeling them. And the only difference was that I didn’t have grades, but my interest in comic books and video games was the same. That’s why I became interested in superheroes; I learned to teach myself by reading comic books. And good and bad stories about parables, you know, that superheroes offer hope, they offer real support, and I’ve always wanted to discover and develop my superpowers. ۔ But I remember a certain group of my friends, one day a teacher came and said, “The good news is, we’re forming a group for all of you, and we’re calling it the MSP, the Mortal Student Program. ۔ ” MASP, these were more capable students. And I was the only one who wasn’t on that list, and I formed a group for myself called LASP, a less able student program. And just thinking back, I can’t even think of that mentality. But these, they called them “extraordinary children,” and that’s why I put the extraordinary thing on the cover of the book, that everyone can live an extraordinary life, the limit of perfection is not about perfection. It is possible to go beyond the limit and go beyond it. And so at heart, to answer your question, going back to children and home schooling, I look at everything through a framework that I call the “infinite model.” And when you want to live and where you want to be, whether you are learning it or in any area of ​​life, you may need to find one of these three areas. So Katie, can I explain the framework, and then we can go micro?

Katie: Yes, let’s go.

Jim: All right. So what would I like to do with each one, and we’ll do it really soon, take out a piece of paper and take some notes. If you’re not making notes, at least imagine what I’m going to do to be able to explain to you. I want everyone to think about the three circles that meet, and this is the diagram of the van. For those of you who don’t know what a van diagram is, there are three types; like Mickey Mouse, two ears that hide and overlap each other, and a face that is different from the other two. Is found And this is the unlimited model. And I’m sure; let’s think about it; let’s make it very practical. Let’s think about an area where you feel you are limited, where you are not developing, or you think your child is not developing in a particular area. For you, listening, it could be in a relationship, it could be in your career, it could be in your health and fitness, it could be in your income, it could be in your influence. It could be in your own personal education, it could be your memory or reading. Or it could be for your child. As you’re doing this, so when you’re thinking of being in a box where you’re not progressing, this box is defined in three ways, right? It is three-dimensional. And the three forces that put you in this box are the three forces that will set you free from this box, or free your child from this box, and these are the three circles that are represented. ۔ So, these are the three forces. The first is our mindset. And that’s something you’re very familiar with, are these things about us, about us, about the world, about our children, about the education system, about our assumptions and attitudes about ourselves? Like. What will happen in this category, in this circle, things that you think are possible. What falls into the circle is what you believe you are capable of. Or it could be your child, what your child thinks is possible and what your child thinks he or she is capable of. What you think you deserve will come down to your mindset.

So, this is the first one, and I want to go through three circles, three ladies. I always point out, I abbreviate everything. Easy to remember, right? The last M, just to move faster, are the ways. And this book was basically a book of methods before I changed it. It was all, you know, the things you mentioned, how to read fast, facts, figures, foreign languages, how to become a critical thinker, how to focus and focus. These are things we value, but we are not necessarily taught in school. School teaches us what to learn, what to read and what to read, what to remember, what to focus on, what to think, but not to learn, and how to learn, and how to pay attention. Is, and how to remember, and how, really, how to read effectively, and certainly how to think. And so the book, before I change it, was really a self-help manual about meta-learning, learning how to learn, about any stage or stage of life. And then I asked myself this question before I emailed it, I said, “Will the 100% of people who read this book get the results they were hoping for?” And I didn’t have an honest answer. And it was really hard for me to reconcile because you know, the book was done, and everyone who saw it said, “It’s amazing. It’s like a blueprint for fast learning.” I wasn’t happy about that because I want people to get results. And so I went back, and I added two extra circles, if you like, or parts of the book, and the first is your mindset. Because the challenge is if I tell someone how to memorize things in a biology class, but they are; and maybe that’s the way it is, but their mindset is “I’m not smart enough” or “I’m broken.” یا “مجھے ایک خوفناک یاد ہے ،” پھر اس کا اثر اس پر پڑتا ہے ، اور یہ اب بھی اس خانے کے اندر کسی بچے یا بالغ کو برقرار رکھے گا ، اس ذہنیت سے ، لہذا ہمیں اس پر توجہ دینی ہوگی۔

دوسرا ایم آپ کی حوصلہ افزائی ہے۔ اور حوصلہ افزائی دلچسپ ہے کیونکہ بہت سارے لوگوں کو محرک احساس ہوتا ہے جو ہمیشہ عارضی ہوتا ہے۔ یہ آپ بیدار ہوئے ہیں اور آپ کو امید ہے کہ آپ کو حوصلہ ملا ہے ، یا آپ کسی سیمینار میں جاتے ہیں اور آپ اوپر سے نیچے جاتے ہیں ، اور آپ اپنی مٹھی کو پمپ کرتے ہیں اور آپ نے تالیاں بجاتے ہیں ، اور آپ صرف دیکھتے ہیں کہ آپ کل X ، Y ، Z کرنے کے لئے اتنے متحرک ہیں۔ . لیکن اگلے دن آتا ہے اور ، آپ جانتے ہو ، X ، Y ، Z نہیں ہوتا ہے۔ اور اس لئے میں نے محض حوصلہ افزائی کا ایک فارمولا نکالا ، نہ صرف بڑوں کے لئے بلکہ بچوں کے لئے بھی ، کسی بھی انسان کے لئے ، اور یہ فارمولا P اوقات E بار S3 ہے۔ لہذا چاہے آپ اپنے آپ کو حوصلہ افزائی کرنا چاہتے ہو یا کسی بچے کی حوصلہ افزائی کرنا چاہتے ہو ، یہ تینوں اجزاء ہیں ، P اوقات E اوقات S3۔ اور صرف بہت ہی مختصر طور پر ، چاہے یہ کسی بچے کو اپنے کمرے کو صاف کرنے یا تعلیم حاصل کرنے کے لئے متحرک کر رہا ہو ، یا آپ خود جان رہے ہو ، آج آپ تھوڑا سا ورزش کریں یا مراقبہ کریں ، یا آپ جانتے ہو ، کچھ سرخ روشنی کرو یا کولڈ تھراپی ، آپ جانتے ہو ، آپ کو… مستقل رہنے کے ل these آپ کو ان تینوں اجزاء کی ضرورت ہے۔ کیونکہ حوصلہ افزائی ، واحد ثبوت کسی کو حوصلہ افزائی کرتا ہے ، خود ، آپ کے بچے ، کوئی بھی ، آپ کا ملازم ، آپ کی ٹیم اگر وہ کچھ کر رہی ہے۔ آپ کی بات یہ نہیں ہے۔ آپ کہہ سکتے ہو کہ آپ حوصلہ افزائی کر چکے ہیں ، لیکن اس کا مطلب یہ نہیں ہے۔ اور اگر آپ کو حوصلہ افزائی محسوس ہوتی ہے ، لیکن اگر آپ یہ کام نہیں کررہے ہیں تو ، اس کا اب بھی کوئی گنتی نہیں ہے۔ تو میں نے کیا کیا مجھے احساس ہوا کہ… میں نے یہ سوچنے والا تجربہ کیا ، اور میں نے کہا ، ٹھیک ہے ، مجھے احساس ہے کہ انسانی حوصلہ افزائی ضروری ہے کیونکہ بہت سارے لوگ طریقوں کو جانتے ہیں ، لیکن وہ پھر بھی یہ کام نہیں کرتے ہیں۔ چاہے وہ ان کے کاروبار اور مارکیٹنگ میں ہو ، سرمایہ کاری ہو ، اور آپ ان کے ذاتی لحاظ سے جانتے ہو ، کارکردگی ، اور ان کے بچوں کی پرورش جانتے ہو ، لیکن وہ ایسا نہیں کرتے ہیں کیونکہ عقل مندی عام رواج نہیں ہے۔ تو ، چابیاں کیا ہیں؟

تو میں نے یہ سوچ کر یہ تجربہ کیا کہ ٹھیک ہے ، اگر ہم حتمی محرک انسان کی تعمیر کرنے جارہے ہیں تو ، یہ حتمی محرک انسان ہے ، ان کی ڈرائیو بے لگام ہے ، وہ باز نہیں آئیں گے ، اور اجزاء کیا ہیں؟ اور میں نے کہا کہ پہلی چیز جس کی ہمیں ضرورت ہے وہ پی ہے ، اور پی مقصد کے لئے کھڑا ہے۔ اور میرا مطلب زندگی کے مقصد سے نہیں ہے ، حالانکہ میں کتاب میں اس پر تفصیل کے ساتھ تفصیل سے کام کرتا ہوں۔ میرا مطلب ہے کہ اس سرگرمی کو کرنے کی ایک وجہ ہے ، کیونکہ وجوہات نتیجہ اخذ کرتے ہیں۔ اور اسے محض ادراک سے سمجھنے کے لئے نہیں ، ایک بچہ یا بالغ نہیں ہوتا… یہ صرف یہ جاننا نہیں ہوتا ہے کہ یہ آپ کے ل and اچھا ہے اور اس سے جو انعامات ملیں گے ، لیکن آپ کو یہ محسوس کرنا ہوگا۔ کیونکہ اگر آپ کو یہ محسوس نہیں ہوتا ہے… تو ہم اتنے منطقی نہیں ہیں جتنا کہ ہم حیاتیاتی ہیں۔ اور جب آپ ڈوپامائن ، آکسیٹوسن ، سیروٹونن ، اینڈورفنز ، اس کیمیائی سوپ کے بارے میں سوچتے ہیں جو ہم ہیں ، تو ہم جذبات سے متاثر ہوتے ہیں۔ در حقیقت ، جب جذبات کھیل میں ہوں تو ہم بہتر انداز میں سیکھتے ہیں ، بجائے اس کے کہ وہ نہ ہوں۔ اور اس طرح آپ اپنے آپ کو محسوس کرنے کی اجازت دیتے ہوئے ، اور اس سرگرمی سے حاصل ہونے والے انعامات ، اور اس سرگرمی کو انجام نہ دینے سے پیدا ہونے والی تکلیف ، یا اس تکلیف کی تکمیل کے ل؟ کس طرح فائدہ اٹھا سکتے ہیں؟ مثال کے طور پر ، میرا ایک دوست ہے جو ہر صبح 4:30 بجے اٹھتا ہے ، اور وہ کام کرتے ہیں۔ اور میں حیرت زدہ تھا ، کیوں کہ میں صرف… آپ کو معلوم ہے ، لوگوں کی ذہنیت ہے ، میں ہمیشہ شوقین رہتا ہوں۔ تو میں اس طرح تھا ، “کیا آپ صبح کے آدمی ہیں؟” وہ ایسا ہی تھا ، “نہیں ، بالکل نہیں۔” میں پسند کرتا ہوں ، “ٹھیک ہے ، پھر آپ واقعی میں کام کرنا پسند کریں گے ، اگر آپ صبح ساڑھے 4 بجے اٹھتے ہیں۔” وہ ایسا ہی ہے ، “نہیں ، مجھے صبح اٹھنے میں اس سے کہیں زیادہ کام کرنے سے نفرت ہے ،” اور مجھے پسند ہے ، “واہ”۔

لہذا ، کچھ لوگوں کے خیال میں آپ کو اس سرگرمی سے لطف اندوز ہونا پڑے گا ، لیکن یہ ضروری نہیں کہ یہ سچ ہو ، لیکن آپ کو ایسا کرنے کی ایک وجہ کی ضرورت ہے۔ اس کا مطلب ہے کہ میں… صبح کے معمول کا ایک حصہ ، ان لوگوں کے لئے لیتا ہوں جنہوں نے میرا پوڈ کاسٹ یا میرے ویڈیوز سنے ہیں ، کیا میں سردی سے شاور لیتا ہوں؟ میں نے ویم ہوف سے سات سال پہلے ملاقات کی تھی ، اور میں سات سالوں سے ٹھنڈ شاور اور برف کے حمام لے رہا ہوں۔ میں نے کبھی ایک دن بھی نہیں چھوڑا۔ اور سچ کہا جائے ، میں واقعتا، ، میں شمال مشرق میں پلا بڑھا ہوں ، مجھے سردی پسند نہیں ہے۔ مجھے سردی واقعی ناپسند ہے۔ لیکن میں یہ کرتا ہوں ، اور میں اسے کبھی نہیں کھوتا ہوں کیونکہ میرے پاس وجوہات ہیں ، کیونکہ میں جانتا ہوں کہ بعد میں میں کیسا محسوس کرتا ہوں۔ یہ اس طرح ہے ، میرے لئے اعصابی نظام کا بہترین ری سیٹ۔ مجھے معلوم ہے کہ آپ کافی جانتے ہو اس سے بھی بہتر محسوس ہوتا ہوں۔ یہ میرے جسم میں سوزش کو کم کرتا ہے ، مجھے پتہ ہے ، آپ کو معلوم ہے ، حیرت انگیز نشوونما کی سطح ہے ، جب میں افراتفری یا سردی میں سکون پا سکتا ہوں۔ اور اس لئے میں نے کبھی اس کی کمی محسوس نہیں کی کیونکہ مجھے وجوہات محسوس ہو رہی ہیں ، آپ جانتے ہو؟ اور پھر صرف ایک آخری مثال یہ ہے کہ حال ہی میں میں نے اپنے ایک جاننے والے سے ملاقات کی ، اور میں نے کسی کو حال ہی میں دیکھا کہ میں واقعتا قریب سے نہیں جانتا ہوں ، لیکن وہ حیرت انگیز نظر آتے ہیں ، لیکن وہ ہمیشہ ایسی نہیں تھیں۔ آپ کو معلوم ہے کہ تمباکو نوشی اور کھانے پینے اور اس طرح کی چیزوں کے معاملے میں ان کا واقعتا comprom سمجھوتہ کرنے والا طرز زندگی تھا ، اور انہیں دل کا دورہ پڑا تھا ، لیکن اس کے بعد بھی انھوں نے کوئی تبدیلی نہیں کی۔ اور پھر انہوں نے کیا ، اور میں جاننا چاہتا ہوں ، “ارے ، آپ کو ایسا کرنے کی کیا وجہ ہے ، اور اپنی فلاح و بہبود کو ترجیح دینے کے لئے؟” اور اس نے کہا کہ یہ بیٹی تھی ، آپ جانتے ہو ، کون جوان ہے ، اور آپ جانتے ہو ، پرائمری اسکول میں ، اور ایک دن وہ رو رہی تھی اور رو رہی تھی ، اور وہ یہ جاننا چاہتا تھا کہ اس کی وجہ کیا ہے۔ اور تم جانتے ہو ، اس نے کہا تھا کہ وہ چاہتی تھی کہ وہ اس کی موجودگی میں اس کی موجودگی میں ہو ، اور تم جانتے ہو ، اسے اس گلیارے پر چلنا ہے ، اس طرح کی چیز۔ اور یہ صرف… اس نے اس مقصد کو محسوس کیا ، اور جب سے وہ مستقل ، متحرک ہے۔

تو ، اس کا مقصد ہے۔ تو پھر جب میں اس تجربے میں واپس جا رہا ہوں تو ، میں سوچ رہا ہوں ، ٹھیک ہے ، اگر کچھ انسانوں کا صرف اس مقصد سے ہے ، تو کیا وہ ہمیشہ حوصلہ افزائی کریں گے؟ اور میں نے کہا ، نہیں ، وہ ای کو چھوٹ سکتے ہیں ، اور ای توانائی کا مطلب ہے۔ مطلب ، واپس چلو ، ہم کہتے ہیں کہ ورزش جیسی ایک آسان سی چیز ، شاید آپ کو مقصد اور ورزش کرنے کی وجوہات محسوس ہوں ، لیکن آپ کو نوزائیدہ پیدا ہوا ہے اور آپ نے تین راتوں میں سویا نہیں ہے ، آپ شاید ایسا ہی نہیں ہوں گے حوصلہ افزائی کی وجہ سے آپ تھک جانے والے ہیں نا؟ اور ہوسکتا ہے آپ جانتے ہو کہ رہنما قارئین ہیں ، اور حیرت کی بات ہے اگر کسی کو دہائیوں کا تجربہ ہو ، تو وہ اسے کتاب میں ڈال دیتے ہیں اور آپ بیٹھ کر کچھ دن میں اس کتاب کو پڑھ سکتے ہیں ، اور آپ جان سکتے ہو ، کئی دہائیوں کو ، ڈاؤن لوڈ کرسکتے ہیں۔ اور آپ کو فائدہ محسوس ہوتا ہے اور آپ مقصد کو محسوس کرتے ہیں۔ آپ ماہر ہوسکتے ہیں ، آپ زیادہ سے زیادہ رقم کما سکتے ہیں ، آپ زیادہ سے زیادہ لوگوں کی خدمت کرسکتے ہیں ، آپ بہتر فیصلے کرسکتے ہیں۔ آپ اسے محسوس کرسکتے ہیں۔ لیکن ہوسکتا ہے کہ آپ نے ایک بڑا پروسس شدہ کھانا کھایا ہو اور آپ کو فوڈ کوما ہو ، اور آپ کو توانائی کی کمی ہو ، شاید آپ اس دن پڑھنے یا مطالعہ کرنے کی تحریک نہ کریں۔ یا آپ کے بچے کو اس دن پڑھنے اور مطالعہ کرنے کی تحریک نہیں ہوگی کیونکہ ان میں توانائی کی کمی ہے۔ اور پھر میرا دماغ چلا گیا ، آخر ، تو ٹھیک ہے ، کیا کچھ غائب ہے؟ اگر کسی میں ، کسی بالغ یا کسی بچے کا مقصد ہوتا ہے تو ، وہ اسے محسوس کرتے ہیں ، ان میں کافی توانائی ہے ، آپ جانتے ہیں ، کیوں کہ ہم آپ کی نیند اور تناؤ کے نظم و نسق کو بہتر بنانے کے لئے کتاب کی تمام چیزوں ، ہر چیز ، دماغ کی بہترین غذا کے بارے میں بات کرتے ہیں۔ ، کیا وہ ہمیشہ حوصلہ افزائی کریں گے؟ اور میں نے کہا ، نہیں۔ آخری چیز غائب ، S3 ، چھوٹے ، آسان اقدامات۔

اور میں نے محسوس کیا کہ جو چیزیں بعض اوقات غیر متحرک رکھتی ہے ، یہاں تک کہ اگر ان کا مقصد ہو ، چاہے ان کے پاس کثرت سے توانائی ہو ، وہ نہیں جانتے کہ انہیں کیا کرنا ہے ، یا اس چیز کے بارے میں جو وہ سوچ رہے ہیں وہ بھی بہت ہی خوفناک ہے۔ یہ اوہ کی طرح ہے ، میں بنانا چاہتا ہوں ، آپ جانتے ہو ، اگلے ملین ڈالر کا کاروبار آن لائن ہے ، آپ جانتے ہو ، میں اپنے روحانی ساتھی سے ملنا چاہتا ہوں اور خوشی خوشی زندگی گزارنا چاہتا ہوں ، ان کے عزائم خواہ کچھ بھی ہوں ، انھوں نے اسے حاصل کرنے کے قابل اقدامات میں نہیں توڑا۔ . اور آپ کو اپنا چھوٹا ، آسان سا قدم ، S3 کس طرح لگتا ہے ، ایک آسان سا سوال پوچھ رہا ہے جیسے میں ابھی سب سے چھوٹی کارروائی کرسکتا ہوں جو مجھے اس مقصد کی طرف ترقی دے گا ، جہاں میں ناکام نہیں ہوسکتا۔ مجھے اس مقصد کی طرف ترقی دینے کے لئے میں ابھی سب سے چھوٹی کارروائی کیا کرسکتا ہوں ، جہاں میں ناکام نہیں ہوسکتا؟ اور اس طرح کی آسان چیزیں جیسے کام کرنا اور پیلیٹ یا سول سائکل کرنا یا ایک گھنٹہ بھی کچھ مشکل ہے ، یہ بہت ڈراونا ہے ، ہوسکتا ہے کہ آپ اپنے جوتوں کو چلائیں ، یہ آپ کا چھوٹا اور آسان قدم ہے۔ ہوسکتا ہے کہ وہ دن میں ایک گھنٹہ یا 45 منٹ میں دن نہیں پڑھ رہا ہو ، شاید یہ کتاب کھول رہا ہو ، یا ہوسکتا ہے کہ اس صفحے پر پہلی سطور پڑھ رہا ہو۔ اور اس طرح انچ انچ ، یہ ایک پنچھی ہے ، یارڈ باڑ صحن ، یہ راستہ بہت مشکل ہے۔ اور یہ واقعتا ہمارے پاس حوصلہ افزائی کا فارمولا ہے۔

اور پھر آخر کار ، آپ کے سوال میں ، آخری… اب جب کہ یہ پہلی دو محترمہ اپنی جگہ پر ہیں ، اور آپ کو معلوم ہے ، ہمارے پاس یہ ذہنیت ہے کہ ، آپ جانتے ہیں ، ایک بچہ یقین کرتا ہے کہ یہ ممکن ہے ، یا انہیں یقین ہے کہ وہ اس کے مستحق ہیں ، وہ یقین کرتے ہیں وہ اس کے اہل ہیں ، اسی جگہ ہم نے LIE میں سے کچھ کو سیکھنے کے لئے تیار کیا۔ میرے خیال میں وہاں سات ہیں… میں نے گذشتہ بیس سالوں میں جمع کیا ہے ، جیسے سات بنیادی ایل آئی ای جو آبادی کی اکثریت ہم سبسکرائب کرتے ہیں۔ اور ایک LIE ، میرے نزدیک ایک محدود آئیڈیا انٹرٹینڈڈ کا مطلب ہے۔ یہ ضروری نہیں ہے کہ سچ ہو ، لیکن یہ ایک محدود خیال ہے جس کو ہم توانائی دینے کا انتخاب کرتے ہیں۔ اور اس طرح ہم ان کو ختم کرتے ہیں ، آپ جانتے ہیں ، ہم لوگوں کو مقصد کا پتہ لگانے کا طریقہ دکھاتے ہیں ، اور وہ ان کی مشقوں کے ذریعے محسوس کرتے ہیں ، اور پھر ، آپ جانتے ہیں ، ان کی توانائی کو بہتر بناتے ہیں ، چیزوں کو توڑ دیتے ہیں۔ پھر ہم انھیں تیز پڑھنے کے طریقے ، اور تنقیدی سوچ اور ہر چیز سکھاتے ہیں۔ لیکن “آہ” آتا ہے ، جیسے جیسے آپ ابھی آریگرام کو دیکھ رہے ہیں ، تین محترمہ ، وہاں بھی تین ہیں۔ جہاں ذہنیت حوصلہ افزائی کے ساتھ عبور کرتی ہے ، آپ کو متاثر ہوتا ہے۔ جہاں ذہنیت حوصلہ افزائی کے ساتھ عبور کرتی ہے ، آپ کو متاثر ہوتا ہے۔ اب ، آپ کے پاس ذہن سازی کے ماہر ہیں ، آپ کے پاس ذہنیت کی کتابیں ہیں۔ میری ایک پسندیدہ کتاب کیرول ڈویک کی ہے ، جسے “مائنڈسیٹ” کہا جاتا ہے۔ آپ کے پاس حوصلہ افزا اسپیکر ہیں ، آپ کے پاس حوصلہ افزائی کے ماہر ہیں ، حوصلہ افزا کتابیں ہیں۔ اور آپ کے پاس ، جہاں وہ عبور ، متاثر کن اسپیکر ، اور متاثر کن کتابیں ، اور متاثر کن فلمیں ہیں۔ اور عام طور پر ، اور وہ کیا کرتے ہیں یہ ہے کہ ممکن ہے اس کے بارے میں آپ کی ذہنیت بدل جائے ، اور وہ اسے تھوڑا سا کھول دیتے ہیں ، اور وہ آپ کو کچھ توانائی یا کچھ ترغیب بھی دیتے ہیں۔

لیکن مسئلہ یہ ہے کہ آپ کو متاثر کیا گیا ہے ، آپ کو الہام ہے ، لیکن آپ نہیں جانتے کہ کیا کرنا ہے ، ٹھیک ہے؟ اور لہذا آپ کے پاس طریقوں کی کمی ہے کیونکہ وہ طریقوں کے ساتھ گذر نہیں رہا ہے۔ جہاں ذہنیت طریقوں کے ساتھ عبور کرتی ہے ، آپ کے پاس نظریہ ہے۔ مطلب یہ آپ کی ذہنیت ہے ، یہ آپ کے دماغ میں ہے ، آپ کو یقین ہے کہ یہ ممکن ہے ، آپ کو یقین ہے کہ آپ اس کے اہل ہیں ، آپ کو یقین ہے کہ آپ اس کے بھی مستحق ہیں۔ اور طریقے ، آپ جانتے ہو ، تیز پڑھنے یا زبانیں سیکھنے کا عمل ، یا آپ جانتے ہو ، اپنے بچوں کو مطالعے میں مدد فراہم کرتے ہیں ، لیکن آپ کو حوصلہ افزائی نہیں ہے ، لہذا یہ صرف خیال ہی نہیں رکھتا ہے۔ تو ، یہ ایک نظریہ ہے۔ اور پھر آخر کار ، جہاں آپ کے پاس حوصلہ افزائی اور طریقے ہیں ، آپ پر عمل درآمد ہوگا۔ آپ مقصد ، توانائی اور آپ کے عمل کے لئے ترغیب پاتے ہیں ، آپ جانتے ہو کہ کس طرح مطالعہ کرنا ہے ، اور کس طرح توجہ دینا ہے ، اور کس طرح فعال طور پر سننا ہے۔ لیکن جہاں آپ پھنس چکے ہیں ، آپ پھر بھی اس خانے میں پھنس سکتے ہیں کیوں کہ آپ صرف اتنا ہی کامیاب ہوسکتے ہیں جتنا آپ کی ذہنیت کی اجازت ہے۔ اور اسی طرح ، آپ کو یقین نہیں ہوگا کہ یہ آپ کے لئے ممکن ہے ، آپ کو یقین نہیں ہوگا کہ آپ اتنی رقم کما سکتے ہیں ، آپ کو یقین نہیں ہوگا کہ آپ اس کے مستحق ہیں ، آپ جانتے ہیں کہ اس کا نتیجہ ہے۔ اور اب ، جہاں تینوں ہی ہیں اور تینوں محترمہ درمیان میں ہی ملتی ہیں ، آپ کا چوتھا I ہے ، جو انضمام ہے۔ انٹیگریشن ، جیسے انٹیجر یا لازمی اسباب کا مطلب ہے کہ آپ پورے ہیں ، اور اسی وجہ سے آپ کون ہیں۔ اس وسط میں ، بالکل وسط میں ، یہ لامحدود کیفیت کی حیثیت رکھتا ہے ، اور یہی واقعی مقصد ہے۔

تو میں جس کے ساتھ کام کر رہا ہوں وہ یہ ہے کہ… ایک بار پھر ، کسی بھی عمر یا زندگی کے کسی بھی مرحلے میں ، میں اس فریم ورک کے ذریعے دیکھ رہا ہوں ، کیونکہ… اور ہر ایک ، میں آپ کو بھی یہی کام کرنے کی دعوت دیتا ہوں ، اگر آپ اس خانے میں کہیں پھنس گیا ہے ، یا آپ کا بچہ اس خانہ میں جدوجہد کررہا ہے ، اس سے آپ کو ان امتیازات کی اجازت ملتی ہے… کیونکہ جب تک آپ پوشیدہ نہیں ہوجاتے اور آپ اسے ظاہر نہیں کردیتے ، آپ ایسی چیز لیتے ہیں جو غیر محسوس ہے اور یہ زیادہ ٹھوس ہوجاتا ہے ، تب یہ آپ کو اجازت دیتا ہے اصل مسئلے کو حل کرنے کے لئے ، یہاں رکاوٹ کہاں ہے ، آپ جانتے ہیں ، کہاں ہے جھوٹی حد یا سرحد؟ کیا یہ ان کی ذہن سازی میں ہے ، آپ جانتے ہیں ، کیا وہ یقین نہیں کرتے ہیں کہ یہ ممکن ہے ، کیا وہ یقین نہیں کرتے ہیں کہ یہ ان کے لئے ممکن ہے ، کیا وہ یقین نہیں کرتے ہیں کہ وہ اس کے مستحق ہیں ، وغیرہ۔ یا ان کا مقصد نہیں ہے؟ کیا وہ یہ بچے نہیں جانتے کہ وہ اس مخصوص مضمون کو کیوں پڑھ رہے ہیں؟ کیا ان سے متعلق نہیں ہے ، کیا انھیں انعامات یا نتائج کا احساس نہیں ہوتا ہے؟ یا ان میں توانائی نہیں ہے؟ کیا وہ رات گئے تک رہ رہے ہیں ، کیا وہ غریب ، پروسس شدہ کھانا کھا رہے ہیں ، کیا انھیں دباؤ ہے ، یا وہ ایسے لوگوں کے گرد گزار رہے ہیں جو آپ جانتے ہو ، ایسی توانائی کے پشاچ جو ان کی توانائی چوری کررہے ہیں؟ یا آپ کو معلوم ہے کہ ان میں غذائی اجزاء کی کمی ہے اور کیا ان کو کسی غذائی اجزا کا پروفائل ملنا چاہئے؟ کیونکہ اگر ان کی کمی ہے تو ، آپ جانتے ہو ، کچھ اہم غذائی اجزاء ، آپ کا دماغ انجام نہیں دے رہا ہے ، ٹھیک ہے؟ یا ہوسکتا ہے کہ وہ انتہائی بے ترتیبی ماحول میں ہوں ، اور ہم صفائی جانتے ہو ، آپ جانتے ہو ، اس کے لئے یہ ایک عمدہ اشارے ہے… آپ کی بیرونی دنیا آپ کی داخلی دنیا کی عکاسی ہے ، اور آپ جانتے ہیں ، اور اس طرح یہ آپ کو واضح اور آپ کو توانائی فراہم کرتا ہے۔ یا ہوسکتا ہے کہ انہوں نے اسے ایک چھوٹے سے چھوٹے قدم میں نہیں توڑا ہے ، آپ جانتے ہو؟ ہوسکتا ہے کہ انہیں اس کو ختم کرنے کی ضرورت ہو۔ یا ہوسکتا ہے کہ وہ بار بار دہرائے جانے کے ناقص طریقے ، میموری کے خراب طریقے ، استعمال کررہے ہیں۔ یا ہوسکتا ہے کہ پڑھنے کے ناقص طریقے ، جو آپ جانتے ہو ، دباؤ ڈال رہے ہیں اور پیچھے ہٹ رہے ہیں ، اور توجہ کھو رہے ہیں ، یا ذیلی آواز۔ شاید انہیں اپنے طریقوں کو اپ گریڈ کرنا پڑے۔

لہذا میرا پیغام یہاں کے ہر ایک کے لئے نہیں ہے ، جو کہ دنیا میں اب چل رہا ہے ، موجودہ حالات کو فٹ ہونے کے ل your اپنے خوابوں کو پامال نہ کریں۔ اس کے بجائے ، ان خوابوں کو پورا کرنے کے قابل ہونے کے لئے اپنی ذہنیت ، اپنی ترغیب اور اپنے طریق کار کو اپ گریڈ کریں۔

کیٹی: مجھے یہ پسند ہے۔ اور مجھے لگتا ہے کہ ہم اس میں سے بہت سارے کے لئے واقعی ، شاید انوکھا وقت تشریف لے جارہے ہیں ، اور ابھی ابھی عمومی طور پر بہت زیادہ غیر یقینی صورتحال جاری ہے۔ اور میں اس سلسلے میں تھوڑی دیر بعد جانا چاہتی ہوں ، لیکن مجھے لگتا ہے کہ ابھی بالغوں کے لئے بھی اس وقت تمام پہلوؤں سے بس اتنا زیادہ بمباری کے ساتھ اپنی توجہ برقرار رکھنا واقعی مشکل ہے۔ لہذا ، مجھے ذہنیت کی ترغیب اور طریق کار پسند ہیں۔ میرے خیال میں یہ بہت اہم ہے ، اور پسند کرتا ہے ، بہت سارے لوگوں کے لئے اس سے باز آ جاتا ہے۔ اگر ہم ان ٹکڑوں کو اپنی جگہ پر رکھتے ہیں تو ہم کیسے اپنی توجہ اور اپنے حراستی کو بہتر بنا سکتے ہیں؟

Jim: So, focus and concentration is actually…so, the book is actually three books in one. So I went back into the drawing board, and I loved the methods, but I added a whole section on mindset and a whole section on motivation. But in the third section, where methods actually starts, the very first chapter in that section we talk about the five superpowers, the very first one is focus and concentration. Because without that, you don’t have anything, right? Even when people come to me and they have challenges with their memory and they blame their retention, it’s often not their retention, it’s often more them paying attention. And so without focus… Now, the metaphor I use in the book is more like… It’s interesting. If you go outside and it’s a nice day out, the sun shining, and when you were a child you used to play with those magnifying glasses, and you would burn leaves and things like that. And when you look through a magnifying glass, it’s interesting because that focal point is very…it’s very bright. And isn’t it interesting that we use that word, “bright,” to describe people that we feel are, you know, smart. And maybe they’re not smarter, maybe they’re just better focused. And that’s really the metaphor that I use, that if you take a bulb that has all the same…you might not even see it if the sun’s out, you know, and you’re in your bedroom or in your living room, but if you focus that bulb, it could create a laser that could burn through, you know, maybe a wall. And that’s the power of focus, to be able to get things done.

We know that…and I’ve interviewed so many individuals on this, on my show and just in person for my own research, that concentration, that you could actually practice concentration, that a lot of people, this is something that you could learn and something you could practice, something you could get better at. Yet most people do not practice concentration, what they do is they practice being distracted. And so if we’re looking at this as a metaphor, like a muscle, then distraction is a muscle, and so is concentration. But the thing is, the thing that we’re doing the most is what we’re getting better at. And you know, you and I have had this conversation before but just as a quick reminder, one of the things that is building our distraction muscles is our smart device, right? Especially that one thing I tell people not to do it, that I’ve been telling them for years, just for the first half an hour of the day, don’t touch your phone. Because when you wake up you’re in this relaxed state of awareness, you’re very suggestible, and if the first thing you do is touch your phone, every ring, ping, ding, you know, social media alert, new message, it just trains your distraction. It trains your distraction muscles first thing in the morning, and then you wonder why you can’t focus when you read, you wonder why you have trouble focusing on the Zoom meeting and your mind goes elsewhere, because we’ve built those muscles. Now, the good news is we could also build our focus and concentration muscles just the same, and that’s wonderful. You know, by the way, the second reason why you don’t pick up your phone in the morning, just to address it, it’s not just, you know, your to-do list, it should be on the top of your not-to-do list, is not only does it rewire your brain to be distracted, it also rewires your brain to be reactive, which means that you’re just responding to fires, or you’re on the defense. And you don’t want to start your day just automatically teaching yourself to be reacting and fighting fires and everything. Because we all know that we’ve had a voicemail or social media message, a voicemail message that just ruins our day, and it just hijacks our mind, and so we don’t want to be reactive to things.

So going back to this, there was a study done at Princeton University that found that multiple stimuli present in our visual field at the same time, they compete for neural representation by mutually suppressing their evoked activity throughout the visual cortex. Now, what does that mean? It’s just whenever you’re multitasking…we know, like, multitasking is a myth, that actually going from one thing to another, we’re not actually doing them in parallel, we are actually competing for…you know, our nervous system is competing for the same kind of resources. And so what you waste is time, you make more mistakes…because it could take anywhere from five to twenty minutes to regain your focus and your flow. And also, you not only waste time, you actually burn glucose in the brain, so you’re wasting energy also, which is as important, I think, as your time. And so one of the things to remaining focused, to be able to maintain and reduce the level of distraction is to train your brain to focus on one thing at a time. And it’s that simple, but it’s that difficult, right? So I’m not saying this is an easy thing to do, but in the book…and I’m going to rephrase the whole book, I quote, a French philosopher in the book that says this, “Life is a C between B and D.” “Life is C between B and D.” And people are probably thinking that I’m speaking in code or tongues. B stands for Birth, D stands for Death, C, life, stands for Choice. And it’s those choices that we’re making every single day that really, we could think about, like, our life right now, where we are, a snapshot of where we are right now as the sum total of all the choices we’ve made up to this point? You know, where are we going to live, and what are we going to eat, what are we going to feed our mind, or what are we going to do for our career, who are we going to spend time with, you know? Big decisions, and small, small decisions. And I truly believe that right now, that difficult times can define you, difficult times can diminish you, or difficult times can develop you. But ultimately, you decide. It comes back to the power of choice.

So when I’m talking about distraction at a meta-level, because we always choose. Whatever we’re doing on a regular basis, we’re getting better at. And focusing on one thing, and not distracting ourselves with, you know, some ring, ping, ding social media alert or app notification, to be able to minimize that and practice, instead, focus, like, even something like what I’ve talked about before, simple exercises in the morning. Instead of checking your phone first thing in the morning, like, brushing your teeth with the opposite hand, or eating with the opposite hand. It doesn’t necessarily take more time to do it, but the reason why I do that in my morning routine, or I teach people to do it is because they have to focus on that activity. Besides the fact that if you use different parts of your body it stimulates different parts of your brain. We know this, that there were studies done at Oxford University saying things like jugglers have bigger brains, if you actually learn how to juggle it will create more white matter, and that as a body moves, the brain grooves, that one side of your body controls the other, one side of your brain controls the opposite side of your body. But it’s not a one-way connection, it’s a two-way, so that way, using different parts of your body actually stimulates different parts of your brain. Not only do you get that benefit first thing in the morning when you’re brushing your teeth, but it forces you to be present. And so when you’re doing it, you have to pay attention, and you’re training your attention muscles. So it doesn’t have to take time. Just like even when I talk about taking a cold shower, it doesn’t take more time, it’s just replacing something, you know? Taking a cold shower instead of a warm shower or a hot shower. So, what I would say is concentration is something that you could develop, it’s something that’s a muscle, and it’s something that you could get more fit at. And just by making conscious choices throughout the day, to focus on one thing at a time.

Katie: Yeah, I think that’s so important. And you’re right, most people don’t even think about it, like, we’re just so tied to our devices, and we’re constantly distracted, which is exhausting. And I know for moms, it leads to that overwhelm, when you’re just trying to juggle all of that, all the open loops at one time. And so just making those small shifts in focus can make a big difference. Even if you’re doing the same amount of things, and you can’t not have to get everything done, just being able to close some of those loops or not have them all going at once can make such a big difference.

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I think right now we’re also in a really unique time, as far as learning to navigate kind of new social dynamics. And I don’t like to use the word “social distancing,” because I keep telling people even if we have to physically distance, we need to figure out how to double-down on emotional connection and social connection. But we are definitely much more isolated than we’ve ever had to be before, and I know I’ve read a little bit in different psychology journals about how that can have a really dramatic impact on the brain. So from what you know, like, how is this changing human interaction, how is it changing our brains, and how can we mitigate that?

Jim: Yeah, let’s unpack that. I absolutely agree with you that words have powers, and that words affect your brain. So like, you and I are being social right now, but we’re physically distant, but we’re not being socially distant, and we’re not being mentally distant. And we’re not being emotionally distant. Because those kind of challenges could lead to loneliness, and we know loneliness, you know, is on the rise, and loneliness definitely has an effect on your nervous system, especially for our mental health, and it becomes a very big challenge. You know, my recommendation for people, and the metaphor I’m using is that of a cocoon, right? We’re coming from a caterpillar spinning a cocoon and becoming a butterfly, we’re going through a metamorphosis. And all that is is a life cycle. And we feel like we’re going through a life cycle right now, and this is a great metaphor for transformation because a butterfly is such a profound symbol for change. And when we are cocooning or being physically distant, when we could be alone, you know, we could be alone with our thoughts, which is, you know, unique for a lot of people, and alone with our fears, alone creeps into your doubts. You know, you can be feeling alone, going back to that loneliness, and sometimes it’s tough because the truth is, you know, a lot of us have a tendency to cling to a world that was rather than, you know, being in the present, and progressing and continuing the cycle. And while the beauty is in the butterfly, the growth happens in the cocoon.

So I could think of five quick things that people can be doing to mitigate this challenge, and they’re five Cs. Now first of all, these are just suggestions. Who’s to say…I mean, we’re going through an unprecedented time, and people could experience a wide range of emotions, and that’s part of the human experience. So who’s to say, for me, if somebody wants to spend five hours and watch Netflix, and binge watch that, and…everyone do their own. My primary belief for everything, that I wish I could have installed in myself when I was a child with that broken brain, my number one…like, if somebody asked me, like, if I could just have everybody believe one thing, it would be that we are 100% responsible for our life. And from there, that’s a meta belief that I feel like will have a ripple effect, you know? I feel like that would have a very powerful effect on children, that were not thermometers, we’re thermostats. The thermometer just reacts to everything, and it’s just forced to react to everything that’s going on in the environment, as opposed to a thermostat, which can…it doesn’t react, it engages the environment, but then it sets their intention or their goal, and then, you know, it imposes more of its will to be able to affect the environment and make positive change.

And so going back to “Life is a C between B and D,” C is choice, five choices. I would say that would be healing and nourishing, because what you nourish flourishes. This would be a great time for clarity. And by the way, when I say these five things, they don’t have to take, like, five hours to do. I’m saying even if you could spend five minutes doing any of these things, it would help you move in the right direction. It would be a small, simple step, like we talked about before, that inch by inch, it’s a cinch, that we don’t have to overcomplicate it. Because thinking is good, but overthinking and wanting it to be perfect, that’s just…we know that’s not going to happen, right? Because life, like learning, is just messy. So C, the first C, and I’ll make them easy to remember, is clarity. I would say that solitude is a wonderful opportunity for self-reflection, that sometimes when you’re going 100 miles an hour, we can’t take a pause and just ask ourselves, “Am I going in the right direction in our life?” And so maybe the…you know, a time for ourselves when we’re cocooning, we could take a little bit of time and self-reflect. You know, and that could come through talk therapy, that could come from journaling, that could come from meditation, whatever your practice is. I like the power of questions because I feel like when you ask new questions, you get more clear answers for clarity. A good guiding question could be what’s most important to me in life? Like, sometimes we’re going for months or years, you know, with the same…we never check in with ourselves. Like right now, just what’s most important to me in my life, what’s most important to me at this stage in my career, what’s most important to me with my family, what’s most important to me with my time and impact? And then once you have those things that, you know, we call “values,” once you have your values in line, then ask yourself another question. Are my actions aligned with those things, those answers, those values? Are the things I’m doing each day fulfilling those values? And maybe if they’re not, then we maybe either have to reevaluate our values, or reevaluate our actions. Because then, because if they’re not aligned, that’s where we sabotage ourselves, that’s where we take a step forward and take two leaps back, when our actions are not aligned with the things that are most important to us.

So number one, clarity, number two…and again, this could be also for your children. So you could apply this towards yourself, you could apply this towards your family. The second thing I would say is care, and this is one that you cover in abundance. So, we know that self-care is not selfish. And my contribution here would be yes, and in the book we talk about the best brain foods, and optimizing your sleep, and stress management. I believe it’s just not just physical hygiene, we all know we should be washing our hands, and sanitizing everything, and six feet. My thing for care is just be conscious of your mental hygiene. And my thing with this is, just because we work with students, this is my…you know, going on 29 years, almost three decades, and I spend time with everyone from children with severe learning challenges to, you know, aging adults who have challenges with dementia. I lost, again, my grandmother to Alzheimer’s, and everyone in between. And I would just say one of the things is control what you’re putting in, the input. Meaning that your mind has an algorithm like Instagram and Facebook has an algorithm, that if you just liked and commented on every cat post, the algorithm is going to show you a lot more cats, and it’s going to skew things in terms of your reality, and say, like, there are a lot of cats out there. Same thing with your mind. If you’re just watching the news all the time, and watching… And understand that media is a business, and if it bleeds, it leads. They know that you are the ultimate product that they’re offering their advertisers, and so they want you to show up and spend time.

But if you feel like you’re spending…and now, this is for you to determine, it’s your personal choice and responsibility, if you feel like you’re spending too much time there, let me just remind you it’s just like that algorithm on Facebook, that if you’re just feeding your brain darkness and what’s threatening, you’re just going to…your mind is going to feed you that same algorithm, and you’re going to feel like that’s everything in life. And what happens is, consciously, you can’t pay attention to a lot of things at once, and so you’re not shining the light on opportunity, you’re not shining light on what you call the blessings in your life, what you could be grateful for, you’re not shining the light on possibility and where is the gift in this? And so I’m just saying that there should be some kind of harmony there. And so I would say, and this is the reason why for your brain, chronic stress shrinks your brain. When you’re always in fight or flight, you know, and all this cortisol, adrenaline, it’s not…or your children are, that’s not a good place to study, it’s not a good place to take a test, it’s not a great place to perform. And that’s what chronic stress does. So chronic fear, we know in the areas of psycho- and neuro-immunology that chronic fear, it actually compromises your immune system, makes you more susceptible to colds, to flus, to viruses. And so where is that fear coming from is what we’re feeding our minds, and just know that there’s an algorithm there. Just like you’re training focus or you’re training distraction, you could train your mind to look at what’s wrong. You could also train your brain to look at what you could be grateful for.

And I also think gratitude should be part of everyone’s self-care process, just like self-love. Part of self-love is looking in the mirror and falling back in love with the person that’s looking back at you, that’s been through so much but is still standing. Part of self-care and self-love is knowing when you say yes to somebody or something, you’re not saying no to yourself. Part of self-care is setting borders and boundaries on the things that are important to you, protecting your time, protecting, you know, your emotions, protecting your mindset, you know, also as well. And obviously, what’s being fed into your children’s brain also, to be able to stand guard. And so that’s what I’m talking about for care. And gratitude is amazing because it’s the antidote to fear. You know, if you ask yourself this simple question, like, what if the only things you had in your life tomorrow were the things you expressed gratitude for today? I mean, that would be an interesting thought experiment. Because we know gratitude rewires your brain for positivity, for peace, what if…if you want to feel wealthy in a time of economic disturbance, what if you made a list of all the things you have in your life that money can’t buy, and make that list, and that trains your focus, just like training would be on the media for all the things that are just kind of dark and hazardous. So, that’d be part of care.

The third C…clarity, care, is contribution. And I think that one of the best ways of talking about overcoming fear, and for yourself, for your kids, for your family, is service. What can you do together to contribute some of your time, your talent, your treasure? Because that, just like gratitude is the antidote to fear, so is service and contribution, you know? So for us, we are donating 100% of our proceeds from our book to Alzheimer’s research, and to build schools for children who have no access, and healthcare and clean water. For us on social media, we’re doing some lives on Facebook and Instagram, on teaching kids how to learn, the one subject I feel like is the most important because schools are not in session. You know, so how can you contribute in your time, talent or treasure? And it doesn’t have to be huge. It could be calling on a neighbor that you know is a little bit vulnerable, it could be finding somebody and making sure they have food, the people that are working on the front lines, you know, what’s your unique way of contributing? And then number four, after clarity, care, contribution, is creativity. I mean, this is…and I mean, you’ve heard this before, and maybe it’s not new to you, but I’m just…and again, a coach sometimes just tells you somethings which you, you know, need to hear, what could be supportive of you. Even before what’s going on in the world, there were jobs and opportunities that were going to machines, right, that are being automated, that are going to artificial intelligence. And what makes us truly human and valuable in today’s society? I really do believe, that we’re creators, and you know, the future belongs to the creators.

And so what have you always wanted to create? Because the limit, when I talk about limitless, I believe the limitless resource we have on planet Earth is human potential, that the sky is not the limit, and you know, our mind is the limit. There’s no limit to your creativity, there’s no limit to your imagination, there’s no limit to us coming together, there’s no limit to human determination, right? And so how do we be able to unlock more of those resources? You can be more creative. What has always been in the back of your mind, like a splinter in your brain, that you’ve always wanted to create? Now is an opportune time to write music, or to do your art, or your poetry, or to write that book, or start that blog, or make that video, or start that podcast, or start that business, right? Whatever you’ve always wanted to create. And you’ve heard, like with these memes, which are true, like, it was during the Great Plague that William Shakespeare created “Macbeth,” created “Anthony and Cleopatra.” It was during the plague, when they closed down London, that you know, at one of the universities there, that Isaac Newton had to go home, he had to physically distance himself, and he was sitting underneath the tree and an apple fell on his head, right, and he came up with the theories of motion, the theories of gravity. And I’m not saying we have to create those, but what’s something that we could be creative, you know? Because I also think that some people say that they’re burnt out because they’re doing too much. Maybe you’re not burnt out because you’re doing too much, maybe you’re burnt out because you’re doing too little of the things that make you feel alive. And I think creative expression turns people’s spark on and helps them feel alive.

And then finally, the last C, you have clarity, you have care, contribution, creativity, I would say is capability. Now is a wonderful time to learn, and for your children also to learn. And what have you always wanted…you have your to-do list, and we now know you should have a not-to-do list, and what’s on top of your not-to-do list is touching your phone the first half an hour of the day, which I know is very difficult, but also a to-learn list. What’s on your to-learn list? Because right now, it’s an exciting time because we have unfettered access to everything. I mean, if you could learn anything, Spanish, Salsa, speed reading, there’s a podcast for everything, there’s a YouTube video for everything. And so what have you always wanted to read? And I just, I think reading is so important, again because I’m an advocate for reading. My teachers would have been blown away if I read a book, much less wrote a book, and I feel like reading is to your mind what exercise is to your body. And so I think leaders are readers, and to schedule thirty minutes of reading a day I think is very important for us. But what’s on your to-read list? And so what have you always wanted to learn? And again, you don’t have to dedicate hours upon hours. I’m not saying this should take a lot of time. Small, simple step, you know? What is…you know, spending ten minutes with yourself reflecting, getting that meditation time in or doing a little journaling, asking yourself that question, what’s most important to me in my career, what’s most important to me in my family, in my time, in my life, you know, and are my actions aligned with it? Five, ten minutes of just care that you wouldn’t normally do, you know, which could be going for a walk, or doing some breathing exercises for yourself, or taking…you know, you could be doing a little stretching for yourself, you know? What’s something small? What’s something small you can do to contribute, like that little phone call to or FaceTime to somebody who’s a little lonely, or someone who’s elderly? And what can you do for your creativity? Maybe you could just write for ten minutes. Ten minutes of writing, or something else that makes you come alive.

And then finally, five or ten minutes of reading, or listening to a podcast, or doing something that feeds your mind. And you know, these are the five Cs. And I would say, if I was to add to it, you know, this is the reason why I love your show and I love your community, that can be also another one, another C is community, it’s connect with people. You know, don’t use this time, you know, as an excuse to isolate because, you know, life is not here to be led just solo, it’s social. It’s not just your neurological networks, it’s your social networks, you know, and who you spend time with is who you become. And you know, and that’s why I love your show. Because when do people get consistently encouraged and challenged and educated and people cheering them on? And if you haven’t found that person in your life, then be that person for somebody else, and especially be that person for you. And that’s the metaphor I would use. And then consistency…I could go on forever, but now I’m just thinking about it, structure, when you’re home and you’re maybe not used to being home, adding structure for your children and structure and consistency for yourself is so important. So you know, define that first hour of the day, define that last hour of the day, the first hour to be able to get your mind right, get your children’s mind right, that last hour to really be able to go into that parasympathetic sleep, rest, digest, recover. But add structure where you can because the brain likes to have consistency. And my thoughts on this is it’s just like when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became that butterfly. And sometimes we have to fight through some bad days during some of the best days of our life. And if you’re struggling, you know, my prayers…and I wish you safety, I wish you security, I wish you wholeness, whatever you need the most right now. And remember, you inspire people with your grit, and your grace, and you’re stronger than you think, more than whatever you’re facing right now.

Katie: I love that, and I’m right there with you. I think this is a very unique opportunity if we look at it like that versus…and with every challenge, certainly there is opportunity. And I hope that we can all keep that focus on the positive, keep gratitude front of mind. And also, I hope that some of these things that are happening because of the unusual circumstance right now will stick around. I mean, we are all spending more time with family, or a lot of us are, people are gardening more than they ever have, people are cooking at home more than they ever have. I think there’s some beautiful lessons in this. And parents are, a lot of parents are moving toward homeschooling, even…I’ve heard a lot of parents mentioning maybe not sending their kids back to school, but being able to adapt and learn at home. And so I think it’s opening up some unique possibilities for all of us, and like you said, if we can keep that as the focus and view this as a time of metamorphosis, I think you’re right, we could all emerge stronger, and hopefully more connected with stronger community and stronger families at the end of this. And at the very least, we have to get through this anyway, so why not make the best of it and make it an opportunity for growth, since we’re all here anyway? And like anytime I talk to you, of course, Jim, our time flies by because you’re such a pleasure to talk to. I’ll make sure I link to the book in the show notes, but of course, “Limitless” is available anywhere books are sold. But where else can people find you, if they want to keep learning and keep in touch with you?

Jim: I appreciate that so much. The book is really my legacy. People don’t know this, but I got into an accident where I almost died a few years ago, and that was…because people ask, like, why did you wait three decades to write a book? And it made me think about what I’d leave behind. And so I wanted it to be complete, that if people just found it that they’d be able to get the results. And so people can go to limitlessbook.com, and we have a bunch of free gifts, including a ten-day speed reading memory program that will just… I want this to be the most read book that people buy, you know? Because people are really good at buying books, and they sit on your shelf, and they become shelf-help, not self-help, but people aren’t really good at reading the books. And so I wanted to get people attending the programs so that they would actually be excited, and have the skills to read it. Because I think a lot of people don’t read because they’re not…they don’t feel comfortable doing it, it’s not a fun process for them. And then we do a four-week book club with everybody, and it’s all just included when people buy it on limitlessbook.com. And there are four sections to the book, and we spend one week per section, and three of those sections are the mindset, motivation and methods.

Where people could connect is on social media. Just like yourself, I’m very active. Everything is at @JimKwik, K-W-I-K. I would actually invite people, I challenge them, you know…and then also our podcast, obviously, you could just listen to Jim Kwik, you know, on any of your podcast apps, you can just search for it. And we have a show, about 200 episodes, just 15 minutes long on how to remember names and languages, and study, and change your habits. The last place what I would say is I would challenge everybody, because I think one of the best ways of learning something is by teaching it, and to take a screenshot of this episode and tag Katie, tag myself, I am @JimKwik, K-W-I-K, and share your big “aha”. Because when you share something that you’ve just learned, you’re more likely to integrate it and learn it better. Because again, when you teach it, you learn it twice. And that way your friends and your family, your followers, they could see it. And if you tag us both, I could see it. I’m happy to repost some of, you know, some of the ones that you post. And also, and I’ll actually gift one person, just for fun, a copy of the book. Because I just appreciate…I appreciate your community so much, Katie. Like, we have known each other for quite some time, and you’re a real force for good. You’re an inspiring, you know, force of nature. Because I think this is so even more necessary than ever before, and I love your perspective in that, you know, where is the gift in this, you know, because it’s never all dark. And that’s coming back to the through-line with this entire episode, is that we have a choice. We always have a choice of what we’re going to focus on, what things are going to mean, what are we going to do, and be that butterfly. And be that living example for your children, that…

You know, I have this…I’ll end with this. I have a fear of heights because of…you know, that’s why you see me skydive and do zero-G and those crazy stuff on Instagram and Facebook, because I fell off a roof. That was one of my traumatic brain injuries. And when the butterfly comes out, you… I saw one the other day up in a tree, and I do these games where I’m just trying to, like, if I was that butterfly, what would I be feeling right now? Because that butterfly looks really calm and confident. But I realized it’s calm and it’s confident not because it puts its trust in the tree branch, that butterfly is calm and confident because it puts its trust in its own wings. And I think the process that we go through is we need to know ourselves, and we need to trust ourselves, we need to love ourselves, and then we really, we need to be ourselves. And I think that’s a formula for real fulfillment.

Katie: I love that. I think that’s the perfect place to end. And I’ll make sure that there are links to everything that you mentioned in the show notes, at wellnessmama.fm, including to your book website so people can get the speed reading program and all those bonuses, which is awesome. I really appreciate you sharing that with the community. And thank you so much, Jim, for your time today, and for all the work that you put in. I know that this book, like you mentioned, was a labor of love for many, many years. And I had the chance to read it, it’s absolutely incredible. I definitely encourage all of you guys to pick up a copy. But thanks for the time today, Jim. It’s always a pleasure.

Jim: Katie, you’re the best. Thank you, everybody.

Katie: And thanks, as always, to you for sharing one of your most valuable resources, your time with both of us today. We’re so grateful that you did. And I hope that you will join me again on the next episode of “The Wellness Mama” podcast.

If you’re enjoying these interviews, would you please take two minutes to leave a rating or review on iTunes for me? Doing this helps more people to find the podcast, which means even more moms and families could benefit from the information. I really appreciate your time, and thanks as always for listening.

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