Three Pillars of Healing With Danette May


Baby: Welcome to my mom’s podcast.

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Katie: Hello, and welcome to Fitness Mama Podcast. I’m from KatieWellensmama.com and Wellensy.com. As well as e-health it is my new line of personal care products, which includes hair care, toothpaste and now hand cleaner designs that are designed to work and more. There is also a traditional alternative without any junk.

In this episode, I talk to Dennett May, an American expert on healthy lifestyles. But he has a wonderful story to tell about the horrific loss of a child to help people and to change their mindset and lifestyle. She is the best-selling author of the book “The Rise” and seven books and programs on health and wellness, as well as the co-founder of Mindful Health and the dedicated founder of the Rise Movement.

In this episode, we delve deeper into the mindset. And I’m not complicated by some of the weakest parts of my mental changes over the last two years, as well as its simple and effective and combined fitness and nutrition. He is also the creator of something called Cocoa Bliss which is attached to the Valence Mama.fm show notes which is delicious and which I really enjoy. But I think you’ll really resonate with the part of her mind that really res, and how she moved from being really depressed to creating her own life and helping other people out of her own suffering. So without further ado, join Dennett.

Dennett, welcome to the podcast.

Dennett: I’m so excited to be here. Thanks

Katie: I’m so excited to chat with you today. I’ve been a big fan of your work for a long time and I met you, I’m sure this person was last year, and I knew I wanted to share you with my podcast community. So to begin with, maybe a lot of people are already familiar with you, but whatever it is, can you just hear your own kind of story and who are you today?

Dennett: Wow. Well, how far do you want me to go? You know, for the last six, seven years, I’ve been in this wellness, fitness, nutrition industry, and really, I live up to what I believe in, my purpose, and the reality of it. I am who I am, and what I am. M. had to. And so, definitely keep the program online, and do high level coaching, and create a super food company, and really live the truth, as I said, who I am. But I have to say that a big part of me was a big part of my mess.

Before that time, my shit became my message. You know, I was a trainer, so I’m always in the body, I’m always in the nutrition, but I didn’t have to teach the principles I teach today. I had some ideas about nutrition and fitness that I don’t think were really good. And he killed my son, and I’m really going through a deep depression, and I’m experiencing a complete lack of brain fog, and stimulation, and really being in the dark to really understand at the cellular level. From, the power of movement and the power of food to really awaken us, and engage us in the feeling of well-being that we desire, and explain it.

And at the same time, when, really, I believe, my spark was starting, watching myself shift, and then, thus, helping clients who were shifting at the time, And then, I really wanted to bring it into the world. And that’s where the flowers really were for me, was I like, “I can’t have this information that I’ve got so much and I won’t share it with the world.”

Katie: Understood and, perhaps, some people are listening who can really resonate with some parts of this story. And first I want to say, I’m so sorry for your loss. I can’t imagine losing a child. I think maybe one of the hardest things could happen, and I’m sure there was a long way to go. I was traumatized by my past and I realized more and more, what a journey it is and how consistent it is. I’m interested, when you were in this dark part of stress, take some of these steps. You said mobility is a big part of it, but I feel like people are there, it seems, sometimes, like, you can never find a way. So what were the ways you started to get out of it?

Dennett: Yeah so I was new to depression so I was in an unknown area, and so on, feeling for me, and I imagine it appears in a different way, but for me it was a feeling that I Didn’t even want to go out. I couldn’t even go to buy a loaf of bread. I had a little girl at home, and likewise, I had to show up for it too, but I was literally lying in bed and she, too, would be like, “I’m so hungry.” And I would say, “Can you lift the chair up?” I want to tell her how to serve her from my bed, and then, I will explain to her what prevention is. Of course, if he goes out, don’t go out on the sidewalk. How bad it was

And, for me, being a trainer, I’ve always heard of movement that helps depression, right? Like, this is not a new concept. I knew, I was like, “I had to get out and walk.” Because, of course, you know, my body wasn’t in shape. I had a baby and so, you know, there are signs of a new baby being born. You are just like that, already very slow, you have been defeated. And so, I was like, “I had to walk. I just need to walk. And I couldn’t even get myself to go to my shoes to walk. And I remember, especially. The day I tied those shoes because it was the longest arm of my life, and I came out and I started walking. Literally, my goal was to walk around the block.

And that’s the way you know, I was the last runner. I, like, was involved in sports. So it was really a strange world in which I was. And I remember walking and listening to the birds. And then, honestly, I literally felt like my chest was bursting. It was like every step I took to reclaim myself and really felt every breath, every step for the first time. And I was like, “Wow, that’s going to be what helps me,” because it was allowing me to feel. Sure, I was crying and I could feel everything, but it was better than hearing. And so, it was a really dark day for me, and as such, I made a promise that I would start around the block and then I would give it a go; but I think that’s it, If you can’t find it yourself. Like, believing in me or someone else, “If you move, you will feel again, and if you move, you will heal the wound of your soul. You can heal some of your parts.” Will be touched by no one else.

So, you know, mobility was a big thing, and then obviously, you have a mental fog. And so, after I moved in, you know, I started lifting a little bit, and I was like, “I have to serve my daughter.” And so, I started playing with superfoods, and superfoods have a power that can really help with depression. And at the same time I fell in love with the study of superfoods all over the world and they can really affect your mood, your immunity, and the like, like the power in your system. So that’s really, like, my best advice. And then, from there, you know, you have to take a little step back, but then from there, I started working on my mindset, and rewriting my story, and looking at my limited beliefs, and Looking at your guilt and shame, and writing down the truth of what these stories were about. And they were different, and I really did a deep, deep work around writing down, and screaming, and acting on it.

Katie: Yeah, I can resonate with a lot of that too. And I’ve heard that, you know, when it comes to trauma or something like really severe pain, you often need more than just talking. To be able to do this, you need to connect with the central nervous system and the body. And I think the movement of that place, as you said, is very important. And I’ve found this in my travels over the last two years, and I’ve talked a little bit on the podcast before. But I was sexually traumatized in high school and then it shut down emotionally in a lot of ways, but I thought I’d put it into practice, and I would find ways to feel safe in everyday life. And I was performing extremely well and doing it all, but then it was an unresolved shock. And it wasn’t until my daughters were teenagers, and I realized that there were a lot of body problems to be solved. And I wasn’t comfortable in my body, I wasn’t accepting myself, and I didn’t want to give it to them. I did not want to give them the prison of mind in which I had lived for so long my whole life. And, until then, it wasn’t for me, and it was for your daughter, it seems to you, that I’m willing to face this pain and change, because it was a painful thing to face. Front and back

Dennett: Wow, that’s so powerful.

Katie: Okay, and my story includes movement. In fact, I read the book, “Bodycaps Score”, which, I think, has some really deep points. And there’s talk about how, in a way, trauma can be stored in the body, and that’s why movement can be so helpful, and different types of physical work can be so helpful. And I actually did bodywork with my friend Aaron Alexander, and he basically did a mix of Ralph’s and Acroyoga, and turned me upside down. So it triggered all my control problems, of course and physical work…

Dennett: I love them.

Katie: And it was like reviving the trauma, like, rewinding and moving fast, and then, acting on all her emotions. And, like, I also felt after attacking an animal. Like, I shuddered at all the adrenaline coming out. And it was like the day when I had a starting point and a great focal point for going through my own trauma. And then, really, it turned the house around that you made it so that you have to connect with the body and when we are mentally stuck, movement can sometimes be one of the most powerful tools. And we don’t always have that connection. Like, we think, like, “Oh, I need to talk through it. I need to journal through it. I need to work through it. Or get criticized like us.” Why can’t I work through it, and why am I stuck? “When, really, sometimes the pattern of this movement is broken, it seems so.

Dennett: Yeah Al that sounds pretty crap to me, Looks like BT aint for me either. So when you say rolling, is it like this kind of deep, deep tissue massage? I liked it.

Katie: Yes. With that, I understand, overcoming the aspect of existence; because, I was like, “Oh, yes. No, no, I don’t go back. People don’t pick me up.” And he likes, “Yeah. “Well, at least you didn’t go down without explaining yourself first.” And I like, “What?” And I, in a way, faced them all, and I never expected that bodywork, you know, would release so much shock from everything. It was as if, as you know, the teacher would appear when the student was ready. And so, I think that’s why I like the idea of ​​your columns because I think you tell people concrete ways to work in all of these situations, and that, like everyone else. It can also be different for, the first thing the snowball starts rolling, or is affected by. But you give to people; or you encourage people to reach out to them all. So talk about your pillars because I have read about it in your work and you have heard it before, but explain what your pillars are.

Dennett: Yes, we attack them in a way, and I think you, even, target them in your lifestyle and programs, but this; I think of the three pillars as a coffee table. , And if you only had two legs, it would point you, you should have three pillars to keep it standing, right? And to me, I’m not about having a perfect body or; I think we have these vessels, those vessels, so that we can live happily ever after. And so, for me, this last pillar is the key to the final journey I’m on, and I’m sure it’s on every human being. And so, the first is clearly moving. And not movement because you’re like, “Oh, I want to fit in these genes,” or “I want to see a certain way,” but I’m moving because movement clears the cobwebs. Is. Movement is your gateway to release trauma. It’s the door to happiness, and endorphins, and to feel alive, and to really feel empowered.

And then, there’s food. And there’s food, you know, we’ve heard things like, “Food is medicine,” and it’s true. There is so much energy in food and how it affects our mood, anxiety, depression, energy levels, happiness in itself, obviously, how it affects immunity. So the food is too big. And not just once again, either guilty, or; and, in fact, there’s a lot of mental stuff around it that I’m very interested in.

And then, the third pillar is mindset, because I’m sure if your nutrition is dialed and your mobility is dialed, but you’re living in a state of mind, maybe it’s sad, or maybe Whether it’s anger, or maybe it’s repressed emotions, then you’re not really living in your own happiness. And I know this power of the mind, too, can change your body much faster than the food you put in it or the movement. It can boost your success when you have a healthy body or vice versa, so a piece of mindset. So those are the three pillars.

Katie: I like it. اور میرے خیال میں ، خاص طور پر خواتین اور ماں کے لئے ، خاص طور پر ، شاید ، جیسے ، اس ذہنیت کے ٹکڑے کو بعض اوقات مشکل ہوسکتا ہے۔ اور اس طرح ، میں متجسس ہوں ، جیسے ، آپ اس پر کیسے تشریف لے جاتے ہیں۔ جیسے ، آپ اسے ماں کی حیثیت سے کس طرح تشریف لے جاتے ہیں ، اور وقت کا توازن ، اور خود نگہداشت کو ترجیح دیتے ہو جہاں… جیسے ، یہ میرے سننے والوں کے ساتھ بہت کچھ ہے۔ آپ جانتے ہیں ، جب آپ ماں ہو تو خود کی دیکھ بھال کے لئے کس طرح وقت لگائیں گے؟ کیونکہ ، ظاہر ہے ، آپ کے بچوں کی ترجیح ہے ، اور آپ خاندانی زندگی کے ساتھ اس میں کس طرح توازن رکھتے ہیں؟ کیونکہ میں آپ کے مشن کا ایک بہت بڑا حصہ جانتا ہوں کہ میں نے آپ کے بارے میں بات کرتے ہوئے سنا ہے کہ خواتین کو اونچی زندگی میں خود کو بہترین بننے میں مدد فراہم کرنا ہے۔ اور میں نے ہمیشہ کہا ہے ، میرے خیال میں ماں واقعتا truly سیارے کی سب سے طاقتور قوت ہے۔ اور یہ کہ اگر ہم سب ان چیزوں پر توجہ مرکوز کرنے کی بجائے صرف کچھ چیزوں پر متحد ہوسکتے ہیں جن پر ہم اتفاق نہیں کرتے ہیں تو ، یہ بات حیران کن ہوگی کہ ہم کس حد تک کامیابی حاصل کرسکتے ہیں۔ کیونکہ ، نہ صرف ہم اگلی نسل کو پال رہے ہیں ، ہم بہت ساری قوت خرید کو کنٹرول کرتے ہیں ، لیکن مجھے لگتا ہے کہ ماں کی بھی حیرت انگیز اثر و رسوخ ہے۔ لیکن ماں بھی ، شاید ، سب سے مصروف ، سب سے زیادہ مغلوب ، اکثر زور زور سے کرہ ارض پر موجود افراد ، کیونکہ ہم بہت کچھ کرتے ہیں۔ تو آپ اسے کیسے سنبھال لیں گے؟

ڈینیٹ: اوہ میرے گوش۔ Okay fine. مجھے یہ حوالہ پسند ہے۔ اس میں کہا گیا ہے ، “جو ہاتھ پالنا ہلاتا ہے وہ ہاتھ ہے جو دنیا پر حکمرانی کرتا ہے۔” اور ، آپ جانتے ہو ، اس کے ساتھ ہی ، مجھے کہنا پڑا ، کیوں کہ اب میں نے دو کامیاب کاروبار چلائے ہیں ، میں اپنی زندگی میں کچھ پاگل چیزوں سے گزر چکا ہوں ، اور مجھے آپ کو بتانا پڑے گا ، مجھے لگتا ہے کہ ماں سب سے مشکل کام ہے… جیسے ، مجھے کمرے میں بزنس نمبر چلانے یا بزنس کی تخلیق کرنا ، ہاں ، یہ مشکل ہے ، لیکن جذبات اور زچگی کے اس پورے سفر کے مقابلے میں کچھ نہیں ، اور مجھے لگتا ہے کہ ہر ماں اس کو سمجھ سکتی ہے۔ لہذا ، کوئی صرف اس بات کو تسلیم کر رہا ہے اور یہ جاننے کے لئے اپنے آپ کو فضل دے رہا ہے کہ اوہ ، آپ دکھا رہے ہیں اور یہ سب سے مشکل کام ہے۔ یہ صرف آپ کے جذبات سے گھبرا جاتا ہے ، اور آپ کو دباؤ پڑتا ہے ، اور یہ ہمیشہ ایسا ہی ہوتا ہے جیسے آپ اپنے سب سے غمزدہ بچے کی طرح خوش ہوں ، اور یہ محرکات کا ایک مکمل ہنگامہ لاتا ہے کیونکہ وہ آپ کے ل، ، سب کا بہترین عکس ہے۔ مختلف چیزیں جو آپ کو اپنے اندر ٹھیک کرنے کی ضرورت ہوتی ہیں۔ یہ خوبصورت ہے. میں تھوڑا سا طنز کرنے والا ہوں۔

لیکن یہاں میں یہ کر رہا ہوں کیونکہ میں جانتا ہوں کہ بچے بہت سارے محرکات لاسکتے ہیں ، اور یہ بھی ، آپ چاہتے ہیں کہ ، ایک ماں کی حیثیت سے ، وہ انتہائی خوش رہو ، اور اچھے کام کر رہے ہو۔ اور جیسا کہ میں نے کہا ، اکثر اوقات ہم اپنے دکھی بچestے کی طرح ہی خوش رہتے ہیں ، تو ایسا ہی ہے ، ہم اپنے آپ کو بھی ہر ایک کو متحرک اور ترقی کرتے رہیں۔ اور کچھ کام جن کا میں نے مطالعہ کیا ہے ، اور اگر کوئی اس پر غور کرنا چاہتا ہے تو وہ “ہوش میں چلنے والا والدین” ہے۔ یہ ایک کتاب ہے جسے “باشعور والدین” کہتے ہیں۔ اور مجھے ایسا لگتا ہے کہ اس کتاب نے والدین میں جو کچھ چل رہا ہے اس کے انڈرگری کے سر پر واقعی کیل لگے ہیں۔ اور ، واقعی ، یہ ہم صرف سچ ہیں کہ ہم کون ہیں کے بارے میں بیدار ہو رہے ہیں ، اور جب ہم یہ کرتے ہیں تو ، بچے شفٹ ہوجاتے ہیں۔ جب ہم واقعی خود اپنے ساتھ حقیقی ہوجاتے ہیں تو اپنے بچوں کے ساتھ ہماری بیرونی دنیا شفٹ ہوجاتی ہے۔ تو میرے لئے ، میں جو کام اپنی ذہنی صحت میں کرتا ہوں اور اس کے ساتھ ساتھ صرف اپنے بچوں کے ساتھ جسمانی تعلق بھی خود ہی کرتا ہوں اس کام کے آس پاس ہوتا ہے ، اور میں اپنے آپ کو کس طرح ظاہر کرتا ہوں ، میں اپنے آپ کو کس طرح پیار کرتا ہوں ، کیونکہ وہ اس محبت کا صرف ایک عکاس ہیں جو آپ اپنے لئے رکھتے ہیں۔

لہذا ، میرے لئے ، ذاتی طور پر ، آپ لوگ ، میں اس کا ایک بہت بڑا دریافت کنندہ ہوں ، مجھے صرف اس میں بہت زیادہ یقین ہے ، اور اگر آپ پوری طرح سے بیدار اور اچھی جگہ پر سوتے ہیں تو آپ یہ کر سکتے ہیں۔ لیکن میرے لئے ، صبح کے وقت سب کے سامنے اٹھنا ، ایسا نہیں ہے کہ یہ نیا طریقہ ہے لیکن یہ کام کرتا ہے۔ اور میرے ل، ، میں سب کے سامنے اٹھتا ہوں اور میں اپنے لئے وہ وقت دیتا ہوں۔ اور یہ میرے لئے جرنل کا شکریہ ادا کرنے کا وقت ہے۔ یہ میرے لئے لیموں کے پانی سے لطف اندوز ہونے کا وقت ہے ، شاید یہ چائے ہو ، یا یہ گرم چاکلیٹ کی طرح ہو یا واقعی مزیدار کافی کی طرح۔ جیسے ، اس بات کو یقینی بنانا کہ میں اس وقت کو اپنی خوشنودی کے ل take ، اس وقت کو شکر گزاری کے ل take لے رہا ہوں۔ میں جرنل کرتا ہوں ، میں اپنے اندر جو چیزیں دیکھتا ہوں اسے لکھتا ہوں ، اس دوران میں خود کو جانتا ہوں۔

کچھ لوگ ورزش کرتے ہیں۔ اب ، اگر میرے گھر میں چھوٹے بچے ہوتے ، تو میرے بچے تھوڑے سے بڑے ہو رہے ہیں ، وہ زیادہ پسند ہیں ، جیسے ، پریٹین ، نوعمر۔ لیکن اگر میرے چھوٹے بچے ہوتے تو ، میں اپنے لئے جانتا ہوں ، اگر میں ان سے بات چیت کرنے سے پہلے اپنے جسم کو منتقل کرتا ہوں تو ، میں بہتر ہوں ، میں زیادہ پرسکون ہوں ، میں زیادہ مستحکم ہوں۔ اور اس طرح ، اگر وہ آپ ہیں ، تو صرف اس کا شیڈول بنائیں ، جیسے ، “ان کے جیسے ، سب کے سامنے آنے سے پہلے میں کام کروں گا۔” اور ، آپ میں سے کچھ ماں کے لئے ، یعنی ، 4:30۔ مجھے یاد ہے جب میری چھوٹی چھوٹی تھی اور میں اس کاروبار کو شروع کررہا تھا ، اور وہ توانائی کی تلاش میں ان میں سے ایک تھی۔ جیسے ، اگر میں صبح 5 بج کر اٹھی تو وہ اسے محسوس کر سکتی ہے ، اور وہ باہر آکر میرے گلے میں رینگنا چاہتی ہے۔ اور آپ کو اس پر فضل کرنا ہوگا ، لیکن کیا آپ کو ، کچھ ایسی چیزیں مل سکتی ہیں جہاں آپ پسند ہو ، “ارے” ، آپ حیران ہوں گے کہ تین اور چار سال کی عمر کے بچے کیا سمجھ سکتے ہیں۔ جیسے ، “ماں کے پاس روحانی وقت ہے۔”

اپنے بچوں کو روحانی وقت کو ترجیح دینا کس قدر حیرت انگیز ہے؟ اور میں اسے یہ کہوں گا۔ اور میں اس طرح ہوتا ، “اور یہ آپ کی جگہ ہے اور آپ رنگ دے سکتے ہیں ، یا آپ…” آپ جانتے ہو ، کچھ لوگ یہاں تک کہہ سکتے ہیں ، “آپ کو معلوم ہے ، میں اس سے نمٹنے کے لئے بھی نہیں جارہا ہوں۔ میں انہیں کچھ دیکھنے دوں گا ، “اگر اس سے آپ کو روحانی وقت مل جائے گا اگر وہ 5:00، 5:30 بجے جب آپ نے ایسا کیا تو اٹھنے کا فیصلہ کرتے ہیں۔ لیکن ، جیسے ، انھیں یہ بتانا ، “یہ میرا وقت آگیا ہے ، اور میں آپ سے پیار کرتا ہوں ، اور میں آپ کو ایک تیز گلے ملنے والا ہوں ، لیکن مجھے آپ کی ضرورت ہے کہ آپ اس رنگین میں سے کسی ایک پر کام کریں ،” اور ان کے ل set اس کو ترتیب دینے کی ضرورت ہے۔ . اس کے لئے تیار رہو۔ اور اگر وہ نہیں بیدار ہوتے ہیں تو ، زبردست ، لیکن اگر وہ کرتے ہیں تو ، ایسا ہے جیسے آپ کے پاس کچھ قائم ہوجائے تاکہ آپ ایسا نہیں ہو ، جیسے ، تمام تر بگڑ اور مایوس ہو کہ وہ آپ کی جگہ میں آگئے۔ تو ، میرے نزدیک ، میں نے کیا کیا تھا اور میں اب بھی جاری رکھنا چاہتا ہوں کیونکہ میں جانتا ہوں کہ میں کم رد عمل کا مظاہرہ کرنے والا ہوں ، اور میں ماں کی حیثیت سے زیادہ مستحکم ہوں۔

کیٹی: میں اتفاق کرتا ہوں ، میں سمجھتا ہوں کہ صبح کا معمول ہر وقت کلیدی حیثیت رکھتا ہے ، لیکن خاص طور پر بچوں کے ساتھ ، اور یہ بھی ، ایک عظیم تحفہ ، جیسے آپ نے کہا ، صبح کا معمول بننا اور اپنے لئے وقت گذارنے کی مثال۔ مجھے معلوم ہے ، جب ذہنیت کو تبدیل کرنے کی بات آتی ہے تو ، میں نے بھی آپ کو اثبات کی طرح چیزوں کے بارے میں بات کرتے ہوئے سنا ہے۔ تو کیا آپ یہ بتا سکتے ہیں کہ آپ خود ان کو کس طرح استعمال کرتے ہیں اور دوسروں کے لئے بھی ان کے بارے میں بات کرتے ہیں؟

ڈینیٹ: ہاں تو یہ میری لائف لائن ہے۔ لہذا اس وقت کے دوران ، جب میں اپنے بیٹے کو کھو گیا ، میں بھی ، جیسا کہ ہم سب جانتے ہیں ، جب فرش ہمارے نیچے سے گرتا ہے ، زیادہ منزلیں گرتی ہیں ، میں واقعتا actually واقعی ایک سخت طلاق سے گزرتا تھا۔ اور اس وقت میں دو لڑکیوں کے ساتھ رہ گیا تھا ، بالکل ایک جوان ماں کی طرح جوان تھا جس کی کوئی مالی مدد نہیں تھی اور سارا پیسہ کھاتوں سے نکل گیا تھا اور میں صرف یہ سوچ رہا تھا کہ میری زندگی کیا نکلے گی ، اور اس لئے میں نے سب کچھ فروخت کردیا فرنیچر ، اور ہم لفظی طور پر فرش پر سوتے تھے ، آپ جانتے ہو ، ٹین فوئل ، جیسے میں نے اینٹینا پر کہا تھا۔ اور میں بہت سارے اسپیکر اور ایسے لوگوں کی باتیں سن رہا تھا ، جن کی تصدیق کے بارے میں میں نے بات کرنے کے لئے تلاش کیا تھا۔ اور میں اس طرح تھا ، “آپ جانتے ہو ، میں مشکل سے اپنے بچوں کو کھانا کھلا سکتا ہوں ، آپ کا کیا مطلب ہے؟” لیکن میں نے کام کیا۔ اور میں نے جو کچھ کیا وہ یہ ہے کہ میں نے لفظی طور پر اس کے بالکل برعکس لکھا ہے جس طرح میں نے محسوس کیا۔ مثال کے طور پر ، “میں ایک خوفناک ماں ہوں ، میں حیرت انگیز ماں ہوں۔ میں ایک معاشی بربادی ہوں ، میں بہت زیادہ ہوں۔ ” اور میں نے لکھا تھا جیسے میں ہوں ، اور پھر لفظ۔ اور یہاں لفظ “میں ہوں” ، اور پھر اس کے بعد آنے والے الفاظ کی طاقت پر تحقیق کی گئی ہے ، تاکہ آپ کے خلیوں میں فریکوینسی اور انرجی ڈرائیو ہوسکے۔ اور اسی طرح ، میں نے ان تمام چیزوں کے بارے میں “میں ہوں” بیانات کا ایک صفحہ تحریر کیا جو میرے خیال میں اس وقت جھوٹ تھا۔ اور میری ایک وابستگی تھی کہ ، جب بھی میں کسی مذاق میں مبتلا ہوجاتا ، ہم سب وہاں رہ چکے ہوتے ہیں ، جیسے ، اپنے آپ پر ، یا غیر محسوس ہونا ، یا نااہل محسوس کرنا ، میں اس فہرست کو نکال کر زور سے پڑھتا ہوں ، اور ، لفظی طور پر ، ایسے دن تھے جب میں اسے ہر 15 منٹ میں نکال لوں گا۔ اور میں انھیں پڑھتا ہوں ، پڑھتا ہوں اور پڑھتا ہوں ، اور مجھے یقین ہے کہ یہ آج کی زندگی میں جہاں تھا وہاں کی زندگی تھی۔ میں آج تک اثبات کرتا ہوں۔ میں خود کو مسح کرنے اور ہمارے اندر رہنے والی طاقت کا دعوی کرنے میں یقین رکھتا ہوں۔ اور ، آپ جانتے ہیں ، میں سارا دن کاروبار ، اور فنیلس ، اور حکمت عملیوں پر بات کرسکتا ہوں ، لیکن یہ ان کم ریشے ہیں جن کا مجھے یقین ہے کہ کبھی بھی تبدیل نہیں ہوتا ہے جو واقعی آپ کی ساری زندگی کو بدل سکتا ہے۔

کیٹی: مجھے یہ پسند ہے۔ اور مجھے لگتا ہے کہ آپ ٹھیک ہیں۔ میرے خیال میں جب ذہن سازی کی بات کی جاتی ہے تو ، اکثر ، ہمیں چیزیں کہنا پڑتی ہیں ، اور زور سے اونچی آواز میں ایک عظیم مثال ہے ، اس سے پہلے کہ ہم ان پر یقین کریں۔ کیونکہ ، میرے لئے ، جیسے وزن کم کرنا ، لہذا میں کھو چکا ہوں ، اصل میں ، اب پچھلے سال کے دوران 100 پونڈ کے قریب۔

ڈینیٹ: واہ۔

کیٹی: ہاں ، تو یہ ایک ڈرامائی شفٹ رہا ہے۔ اور مضحکہ خیز بات یہ تھی کہ اس سے پہلے میں یہ اسکرپٹ رکھتا تھا ، اپنی پوری عمر کی زندگی ، کہ ، “اگر میں صرف X ، Y ، Z ہوتا ، کاش میں اس سائز کا ہوتا ، کاش میں اس طرح نظر آتا ، تب میں ہوتا مبارک ہو ، اور پھر میں خود کو قبول کروں گا ، ”آخری سال میں۔ اور جب یہ سمجھنا میرے لئے زیادہ اہم ہوگیا کہ اپنی بیٹیوں کی خاطر ، میں نے محسوس کیا کہ میں اس وقت خوشی ، خود قبولیت ، اور محبت کا انتخاب کرسکتا ہوں اور اس کی ضرورت کروں گا ، اور میرے جسم کو ایک ایسا طریقہ بننے دو جس سے ظاہر ہوتا ہو ، بمقابلہ میرے جسم کی توقع کرنا وہ چیز ہے جو مجھے خوش کرنے والی ہے ، یا اپنے جسم کو محرومی اور سزا کے ذریعے مجبور کرنے کے لئے ایک خاص راستہ دیکھنے کے ل. اور پھر یہ سوچ کر کہ مجھے خوشی ہوگی۔ اور ایک چیز جو میں نے اس سفر میں استعمال کی تھی وہ تھی۔ اور جس شخص کے ساتھ میں نے کام کیا تھا وہ مجھ سے اونچی آواز میں ایسی باتیں کہے گا ، “اگرچہ ،” جو بھی چیز اس دن سے میں جدوجہد کر رہا تھا ، “میں خود سے محبت کرتا ہوں اور اسے قبول کرتا ہوں۔” اور ، “جب میں اب انتخاب کرتا ہوں تو میں خود سے پیار کرتا ہوں اور اسے قبول کرتا ہوں ،” اور پھر ، جو بھی نئی چیز تھی۔ اور پہلی بار مجھے یہ کہنا پڑا کہ ، جیسے ، میں لفظی طور پر اپنے آپ کو یہ الفاظ کہنے سے قاصر ہوں ، “میں خود سے پیار کرتا ہوں اور خود کو قبول کرتا ہوں ،” آپ جانتے ہو؟ اور یہ ، جیسے ، آپ کی طرح ، ڈرامائی طور پر محسوس کرنا ، میں بھی کاروبار کی بات کرسکتا ہوں ، میں ان سارے شعبوں میں حاصل کرسکتا ہوں ، لیکن مجھے لفظی طور پر یہ الفاظ کہنے میں تکلیف ہوتی ہے کہ میں خود سے محبت کرتا ہوں اور قبول کرتا ہوں۔ اور میں نے محسوس کیا کہ اس طرح مجھے بھی اس کا سامنا کرنا پڑا ہے اور میں اپنے بچوں کے ساتھ کام کرنے کے دوران کمزور ہونے کی ایک مثال بننے کے قابل ہو گیا ہوں ، کیوں کہ اگر وہ ہمارے ذریعہ نہیں تو وہ اور کہاں دیکھتے ہیں؟ لیکن مجھے لگتا ہے کہ اونچی آواز میں بات کرنا واقعی ڈرامائی ہے ، اور ، اکثر ، شاید رعایت ہوجاتی ہے کیونکہ ایسا نہیں لگتا ، اوہ ، بس اتنا کہنا کہ اس سے بڑا فرق پڑتا ہے۔ لیکن ، میرا مطلب ہے ، کم از کم ، میرے لئے ، یہ ڈرامائی تھا ، اور یہ آپ کے لئے بھی لگتا ہے۔

ڈینیٹ: ہاں میرا خیال ہے کہ ہم اپنے دماغ میں بہت ساری بار تار تار کرتے ہیں کہ ہمیں اس کے کام کرنے کے ل something کچھ قیمت ادا کرنے کی ضرورت ہے ، یا اس کے کام کرنے کے ل really واقعی پیچیدہ یا مشکل ہونا پڑتا ہے۔ اور اس طرح ، اگر کوئی ہم سے کہتا ہے ، “ہاں ، آپ بنیادی طور پر خود کو آنکھوں میں دیکھتے ہیں یا اونچی آواز میں کہتے ہیں ،” میں ہوں “، جیسے ،” میں محبت کر رہا ہوں اور میں خود کو قبول کرتا ہوں ، “یا” میں کافی ہوں ، ” یا جو کچھ بھی ان الفاظ میں بلند ہے ، “لوگ ایسے ہیں ،” یہ اتنا آسان نہیں ہوسکتا ، “لیکن ایسا ہے۔ جیسے ، مجھے پیار ہے کہ آپ نے یہ کیسے کہا ، کیٹی ، جب آپ بمشکل ہی الفاظ میں بدلاؤ کرسکتے ہیں کیونکہ زیادہ تر لوگ ایسا محسوس کریں گے۔ انہیں ایسا محسوس ہوگا جیسے وہ جھوٹ بول رہے ہیں اور وہ اس کی طرح ہیں ، “مجھے اتنا سخت آواز میں کہنا اتنا مشکل کیوں ہے؟” اور اس کی وجہ یہ ہے ، جیسے ، جسم جہاں جاتا ہے دماغ اسے کہتا ہے ، لہذا ، ایسا ہے ، یہاں تک کہ اس کو کہنا بھی نہیں جانتا ہے کیونکہ جسم قطار میں بند نہیں ہے۔ لہذا آپ جتنا زیادہ اپنے دماغ سے کہتے ہیں ، یہ دراصل اعصابی نظام کو متاثر کرتا ہے ، اور آپ کا جسم اور زندگی میں آپ کی ساری سمت وہ جگہ جاتی ہے جہاں آپ مستقل طور پر بات کرتے رہتے ہیں۔ تو اپنے آپ کو مسح کرو۔ آپ کون ہیں کی سچائی بولیں۔

کیٹی: مجھے یہ پسند ہے۔ آپ یہ کیسے کریں گے؟ کیا آپ کے پاس ایسی مثالیں موجود ہیں کہ آپ اپنے بچوں کے ساتھ یہ کیسے کرتے ہیں؟ آپ نے کہا کہ آپ کے پاس نو عمر لڑکیاں ہیں۔ چھوٹی عمر سے ہی اس کے کرنے میں آپ ان کی کس طرح مدد کرتے ہیں؟

ڈینیٹ: ہاں کاش میں نے آغاز کیا ہوتا… ظاہر ہے ، میرا سب سے قدیم ، جب میں اپنی تمام مشکل چیزوں سے گزر رہا تھا اور مجھے اس کے بارے میں معلوم ہوا ، وہ تقریبا eight آٹھ یا نو سال کی تھی ، اور پھر میری سب سے چھوٹی تھی ، تم جانتے ہو ، واقعی جوان تھا ، اس لئے میں نے آغاز کیا اس وقت ان کے ساتھ۔ اور میں نے محسوس کیا ہے کہ چھوٹا اس پر زیادہ رضامند ہوتا ہے ، جیسے ، میں نے انہیں سکھایا۔ میں ، ہر رات کی طرح تھا ، کیونکہ جب آپ تھوڑا ہوسکتے ہیں تو آپ کرسکتے ہیں۔ آپ ہوسکتے ہیں ، جیسے ، “ٹھیک ہے ، تین تصدیقی باتیں کہیں۔” تو میں اسے رات کو یہ کہنے پر مجبور کرتا ہوں۔ اور مجھ سے یہ کہنے کے بجائے ، میں انھیں کیا بتاؤں گا میں نے ان میں۔ اور یہ کہ ماں کی حیثیت سے ، میں آپ کو بتانا چاہتا ہوں ، سب سے بڑی چیز یہ رہی ہے کہ میں اپنے بچوں کو رات کے وقت پیش کر سکتا ہوں ، خاص طور پر اگر ان کا برا دن ہوتا۔ یہ واقعی موثر تھا۔ میں اس طرح ہوتا ، “کیا میں آپ کو بتا سکتا ہوں کہ میں آپ میں کیا دیکھ رہا ہوں؟” اور وہ جیسے ہوں گے ، “یقینا۔”

آپ جانتے ہو ، پہلے تو وہ ایسے ہی تھے ، “کیا؟” اور تب میں ان سبھی چیزوں کو بتاؤں گا جو میں نے ان میں دیکھے جو خوبصورت ، طاقت ور اور محبت کرنے والے تھے اور وہ اس مقام پر پہنچ گئے جہاں ان کی طرح تھا ، “مجھے مزید بتاؤ۔” لیکن پھر ، میں نے انہیں سکھایا ، میں نے کہا ، “میں آپ کو جو کچھ آپ میں دیکھ رہا ہوں وہ آپ کو بتانے جا رہا ہوں لیکن مجھے آپ کی ضرورت ہے کہ آپ مجھے ایم ایس کے ذریعے بتادیں ، اور خود ہی بتائیں کہ آپ خود کیا دیکھ رہے ہیں۔” اور یہ ان کے لئے سب سے طاقتور چیز رہی ہے۔ اور اسی طرح ، انہوں نے یہ کافی نوجوان سیکھا۔ اور اسی طرح ، میں ان سے کہتا ہوں ، “اپنے اثبات کریں۔” آپ جانتے ہیں ، ہم کیسے جاتے ہیں ، “اپنی دعا کرو۔” جیسے ، ہم خاندانی دعا کرتے ہیں ، لیکن پھر ، جب وہ بستر پر جاتے ہیں تو ، میں پسند کرتا ہوں ، “اپنے اثبات کو مت بھولنا۔” اور میں امید کرتا ہوں اور دعا کرتا ہوں کہ وہ خود ہی یہ کام کریں کہ ان کی عمر بوڑھے ہوسکتی ہے کیونکہ میں اس پر مجبور نہیں ہوسکتا ، لیکن یہیں سے میں نے شروع کیا تھا جب وہ جوان تھے۔

کیٹی: مجھے یہ پسند ہے ، اور ہم یہ بھی شکرگزار کے ساتھ کرتے ہیں۔ رات کے کھانے یا سونے کے وقت ، ہم اپنے بچوں سے پوچھیں گے ، “آج آپ کس کے شکر گزار ہیں؟” اور انھیں مخصوص ہونے کی ترغیب دیں کیوں کہ بس اس طرح ہونا آسان ہے ، “اوہ ، میں شکر گزار ہوں کہ میرے بہن بھائی ہیں ، یا یہ آپ جانتے ہیں ، ہمارے پاس خاندانی وقت ہے ،” جو بھی ہو۔ لیکن ان کے ل have ، حقیقت میں ، اس کے بارے میں خاص بات بتائیں کہ ان کو اچھ forے کی تلاش کے ل training تربیت دینے کے خیال سے۔ کیونکہ جب آپ جانتے ہو کہ یہ ایسی چیز ہے جس کے بارے میں دن کے آخر میں پوچھا جاتا ہے تو ، آپ دن بھر ان اچھی چیزوں کی تلاش کرتے ہیں اور اثبات کے ساتھ بھی۔ جب آپ ان چیزوں کو اپنے بارے میں کہنے کے قابل ہوجائیں تو ، آپ اپنے آپ میں بھی اچھ forی چیز تلاش کریں گے۔ اور میں سمجھتا ہوں کہ یہ ہمارے فلٹرز قائم کرنے کا خیال ہے۔ Like, if we look for the bad and the pain, we’ll find it always, but if we focus on the good, and I’ve heard you say that, “We experience life from a perspective of pain,” I think is the quote. Am I remembering that right?

Danette: Yeah, maybe.

Katie: But, I think, also, it is a follow-up to that. I think it’s a great call as well. You’re such a big voice for women rising into their power and supporting each other in that, which I think is beautiful, and, maybe, that’s another way we can do that as women, is to be that voice of, “This is the good I see in you,” and calling that out, versus, you know, the mom wars that ensue on social media. Maybe that could become the movement.

Danette: I love that.

Katie: And I wanted to start with mindset because I really do think it’s the most important piece. And certainly, for me, the last two years have really driven that home more and more, that I did everything else “right” for so long. I ate a clean diet. I exercised all the time. And it wasn’t until I dealt with mindset and emotions that any of it shifted, so I wanted to start there. But you, also, are very much an expert in the physical side, and the fitness, and the food, and so, I want to make sure we cover this a little bit more in detail as well. And I love that you have, probably, like a very… Not controversial, but you have your own unique approach to this and you’re not preaching the whole, “We need to just work out more and harder, and we need to eat less.” Like, you take such a cool approach to this. So can you go a little deeper on the physical side, the food, and the movement side?

Danette: Yeah. And let me ask, like, what do you think people want to hear when it comes to the food and the movement? I have really simple guidelines because there’s so much out there, right, no wonder people are confused. I’m in the space and I’m like, “Well, the nutrition industry is shifting all the time.” What was once healthy that we learned is healthy, that we finally discover is not like a year or two later, it’s constantly shifting. And what’s projected on media is, most of the time, most of the time, completely false of what is actually true when it comes to nutrition. And so, it is a big mission of mine because I’m like, “I see it.” I see how there are so many different, you know, “Do I need to be paleo? Do I need to be vegan? Do I need to be raw vegan? Do I need to be…? You know, what do I need to be to be healthy?” And there’s so much discussion around it.

So let me share something that I learned from another researcher just recently. So there’s a woman, I’m a Hay House author, and she was writing specifically around cancer. And she had made it her mission, and like over years, to research cancer patients on what they did to survive. Like, she was researching people that had the type of cancer that most people died from, and she was really diving into this concept with them. And I asked her something. I said, “Because everyone thinks they know what’s the perfect nutrition for everyone,” and I said, “Was there a common denominator when it came to food, that these people took on that healed?” And she was like, “You know what’s interesting,” she’s like, “That was the one area where there was not.”

She was like, “Some people juiced. Some people became vegan. Some people ate meat.” She’s like, “The thing was, it’s whatever they believed is what came out.” So if they believed that eating meat was going to help them, it did. They believed they needed to be vegan and they had to juice, then it did. And my point with this is, there are some basic guidelines, and she said that. She was like, “They all followed the basic guidelines.” Like, they didn’t have toxic oils, or they didn’t eat white or wheat, like, flours, and like white sugars. But outside of that, it didn’t really matter when it came to someone who was dealing with health with their life.” And that’s what I want to share with you all is that it doesn’t need to be super complicated, that there are some parameters to follow. Sometimes I’m vegan. Sometimes I’m vegetarian. Sometimes I eat more paleo, like, but I don’t put myself in a label or a box that I’m one or the other. And the reason is because I don’t actually believe one is right for everyone all the time.

The parameters that I would just make it really, really simple is really be looking for…if you want to go as far as I go, look for superfoods. And those superfoods in my mind are really good, coconut oil, avocados, actually, I think are an amazing superfood and not a lot of people are talking about that. Cacao, raw cacao. So raw cacao is different than cocoa powder so make sure you’re consuming raw cacao. Turmeric, ginger, so trying to get ginger in. I think garlic and onions are a great one when you’re adding to your savory dishes as a superfood kick for all of your different immunities. And then, obviously, dark type of greens, so really looking for that leafy…think of it like being like a sponge. If you were going to clean something, you need a little bit of bristle to get it clean. It’s like that inside your system. So when I speak on those, I would try to get those in my diet once a day, sometimes some of them more than once, you know, in there together, but I’m always trying to find one of them a day, always, if not more than one a day.

The things that I avoid are really simple, and they’re meant to be simple because for me, life’s about living. I’m not going to eat a certain amount and I’m not… You know, I’m just going to, like, enjoy my life. I love food and I think that food made with love and the way I think about that food is going to process in my body in a certain way. And we know this scientifically. The way you think about the food in your body is going to affect how it’s digested in your body and how it’s going to show up, and I’ll get to that in a minute. But the food that I would avoid and that I do avoid, if I ever have them, it’s maybe once or twice a year because I’m in another country and I just want to try X, Y, Z or whatever is their famous thing of that place, but it’s white sugar. I absolutely do not have white sugar in my home. I don’t miss it at all. We use coconut sugar. We use 100% maple syrup. You can use raw honey. I have a lot of sweets in my life but I stay away from white sugar.

Vegetable canola oils, super toxic for your system, so I do not have that in my home nor will I buy products with it, I don’t even buy chips that contain that. We have chips on the regular because our whole family loves nacho night. We just buy the kind that are made with other oils. And you can find those. It’s not hard. And then, white and wheat flour, we do not have in our home either. So we just use almond flour or these different types of combinations that make up a gluten-free flour, because it’s super toxic in systems, and, actually, it can… I’m not a celiac or anything and neither are my children, but there has been correlation with anxiety and white and wheat four. So try taking those things away. And that’s, literally, how we are. And so, obviously, we don’t have soda pop in our home because soda pop contains white sugar. So there’s a lot of foods that have those ingredients that we remove and we don’t consume, but we’ve tried to find alternatives, and there are so many when you look for it, you can find them. So, yeah, that’s my basics.

Katie: I love that. I love the simplicity of your approach. And like I found in my own journey, like, the lack of restrictions and dogma, I agree. I think health is so personalized but there are these general rules that are almost universally applicable. And, like, even like superfoods, for instance, unless you have an allergy to them, they’re almost universally applicable, or avoiding the bad things, like you said. I’m 100% right there with you. We have no biological need for white sugar. There are alternatives that work just as well in anything so it’s an easy swap to make. Same with, rather than vegetable oils which are horrible for you, you can actually get nutrients from olive oil, or avocado, or so many other options. And so I love the simplicity of that. I think in a world of overwhelm, it brings such clarity. And you do this with movement as well. Like, I’m a big fan of when you post on Instagram, the simplicity of your workouts. And so, can you, kind of, give us the overarching approach that you take to that as well?

Danette: Yeah. So my overall approach is, “Do what you like.” So once again, there’s no right or wrong way to move your body. There’s Zumba, there’s HIIT, there’s CrossFit, there’s yoga, there’s Pilates, I mean, there’s all sorts of, kind of, movement. And I always say do what floats your boat and do what really lights you up, because that’s what you’re going to end up doing. If you’re moving and you hate it, once again, your mindset truly affects how food is digested as well as how the movement is actually affecting your body. So if you’re moving your body and you hate it, it most likely is translating that way. And I’m going to speak on running, for example.

I know so many people that call themselves runners but they say they hate running, but they run to be lean, that are not lean. And let me just say, have we ever seen a distance runner that we’ve seen on TV that likes it ever not feeling…? No. And I just want to bring to the point that the mind is so powerful. If you’re running and you hate it, like, you’re like, “I hate this,” I guarantee that it’s going to have, like, a backlash. Either you’re going to get injured, or, two, you, actually, aren’t going to see the results that you were going for.

So find the thing that you love because when you are in pleasure is when the body responds. Now, let me say that again because so many women are so afraid of their pleasure. We’re so good at turning off our pleasure, and I’m talking about all forms of pleasure because movement is actually a form of pleasure. Everyone who gets done, usually with a workout, feels a sense of pleasure. It is a rush of endorphins. There’s this euphoria that comes over your system. It’s not fun before, but after, we get that rush, and so, that pleasure center is huge, so find the thing that you really love.

And for me, I like simple, I like quick, I love running, though, too, so I don’t make that quick. For me, running is like moving therapy. So I go out and run, but I can also hike and get the same benefit, or go for a bike ride and get the same benefit. So I need some long steady cardio. For me, I don’t do long steady cardio for fat loss or to fit in my jeans. It’s, actually, kind of, counterintuitive. I do long steady cardio for my mental capacity. I feel that it is a moving meditation. I feel like it’s therapy that’s absolutely free. I work through so much stuff and that steady-state movement is conducive to, really, healing your system when it comes in your mind. And then, I also just like, really, like, harder, I like some intensity for me, but I also need yoga and Pilates. Even though it’s not my favorite form of moving, I always know it’s very needed at times because I’m pretty fiery. So, you know, just change it up, do what lights you up, try lots of different things, and keep it simple.

Katie: I agree. I think I got stuck in that mindset early on too, of, like, trying to find… Like, everybody had their approach and their exact method you were supposed to follow and it wasn’t… Like, with movement, it wasn’t until I actually started doing it just for fun that I ever wanted to stick with it. And so, now, like my movement is I’ll lift weights because I love it and I feel great after, but not for extended amounts of time. I love sprinting so I’ll race my kids and do a bunch of sprints, and that’s fun, or climb a tree, or hang upside down, like, all these things that I feel like I forgot for so long and that my kids have been great teachers in reminding me.

But I think you’re so right. It has to come back to fun. And same with healthy food, like, the mindset shift, the reason I think that has to come first is you have to want to do these things out of love and nourishment for your body. You have to want to move because it’s fun and because you feel great when you do it. You can’t ever punish yourself into that. And it makes me sad to see so much of the diet and fitness industries that focus more on that, like, extreme, punish, deprivation angle. And why I like your message so much is because you keep it in the positive and you focus on the good. And I think that, especially for women, but for everyone is just so important.

Danette: Thank you.

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Katie: So as we get toward the end, a couple of other questions I love to ask, the first being if there’s a book or any number of books that have had a really dramatic impact on your life, and if so, what they are and why?

Danette: The one that came to mind first when you just asked that was “The Big Leap” by Gay Hendricks. Have you read that, Katie?

Katie: I haven’t.

Danette: Oh, it’s so good. And the reason it’s so good is because it lays out why we upper-limit or why we self-sabotage, and how you navigate that. And it really boils down to, like, really fundamental things like, one, the spotlight. You’re afraid of the spotlight. There’s also ones of, like, failure. Like, and it lays it out, and you can totally learn through the examples he lays out. “Oh, my gosh. That’s me and I didn’t even know that.” And that book really helped me to ensure I didn’t self-sabotage in our business when we first started off. It’s helped me not self-sabotage in my relationship because I got into a new relationship and I had all this old story around trust and things from my previous. It has been game-changing for me, so I’d highly recommend that book.

I’m trying to think. That one is the biggest ones that came up. I’m a ferocious reader so I can tell you so many books. I’m going to speak on an author that I really love. There’s two of them. Napoleon Hill, I think most of us know, “Think and Grow Rich.” But try some of his other books out there. He has so many books that are so really built around the mindset, whether it comes to success in your life or finances that crossover into every area of your life, so Napoleon Hill. And then, I love Paulo Coelho. He wrote “The Alchemist,” which he’s best known for but he has so many other books.

Katie: I love that. And your book “The Rise” is also wonderful. I’ll make sure that’s linked in the show notes as well at wellnessmama.fm if you guys are listening. Also, I think we’d be remiss too in the podcast without talking about your products because you mentioned superfoods, and you have, at least one that I’ve tried, Cacao Bliss, that is amazing. So talk about your products too.

Danette: Oh, thanks. I’m so passionate about it. Obviously, superfoods have been this big power of healing for me. And, you know, what was interesting when I was going through, like, my transition of coming out of depression and really claiming who Danette was is, there was this desire within me to travel to indigenous places. And I don’t know if everyone has that desire but for whatever reason, I would dream about being invited where no blonde hair, blue-eyed girl would be invited. And, literally, because of that intention and holding that vision, I started getting invited.

And I found myself in a particular circle with these indigenous tribe, and most of them were men but there was a few, what they would call the grandmas. And we were sitting in a circle, and in the jungle, and they passed out these little, like, cups with dark liquid in them. And at the time, I didn’t know what it was. And they were like, “We’re doing a ceremony and it’s a cacao ceremony. We do this every full moon. We do it on new moons. But it’s a time for us to set intention, and time for us to connect back to our hearts.” And it was this really profound moment for me when I drank the raw cacao, which they infused with some raw honey from their bees, locally. They actually had sprinkled some turmeric in there, and a little bit of cayenne pepper. I thought it was super delicious but after I drank it, I was, like, feeling this almost euphoria high. I was like, “Whoa, what was in that?” Like, I was happy. And then, honestly, that intention that I set manifested, and they’d said it would. And I was like, “Whoa, what was that?”

And so, I started to talk to the tribe leaders and then I also did research on my own, and what they were serving was raw cacao, and, obviously, it was infused with one superfood which was turmeric. But I started learning about the other superfoods that they, sometimes, add to it. So they were adding, in different tribes, like, mesquite and lucuma, which are, like, different types of superfoods growing in the Southern regions. And they would help build up immunity, would help build up stamina for… If they weren’t able to eat, they could drink cacao. And I also found that cacao was built in for the ages. It was so highly revered in the Mayan culture that they literally buried it, and they revered it more than currency. It was so potent for people’s healing and for cognition, like, people would drink it, and it literally contains theobromine to like…

I get so excited, Katie, by this because they’ve been studies on curing all Alzheimer’s. If you want to, like, open your mind and have blood flow in your mind, and have better brain cognition, and remember things, and get into flow state, drink cacao. And there were so many stories of some of the greats of the greats doing this, and so, I was, like, committed to bringing raw cacao, the way it was cultivated, to our modern world. And so, I looked into trying to find a farmer that actually did it the indigenous way, which called ceremonial grade, where they lay it out in the sun and literally let the sun kiss it, and then, they grind it into a powder. And we infused it with lucuma, mesquite, turmeric, MCT oil, which none of them were doing, but they did, sometimes, add a different kind of fat depending on the region. But I just knew that that was going to be, like, a massive carrier of all the superfoods through the cells.

And I was doing that for like two years on my own, making this, and knowing that I was supposed to bring it to the mainstream, but not knowing how I was going to do it. We’d never sold product before. But I was drinking it and I was telling my whole community about it, and I told them how to mix it, like what was the exact percentages of each ingredient. And people were writing into me going, “I’m not depressed. What’s in this? And I feel good.” Because, we also know that raw cacao contains anandamide, which is only two foods in the world do, which literally acts as like a heart opener. So when you’re feeling love or you’re just done making love, that anandamide is released in your body. And raw cacao, not cocoa but raw cacao contains anandamide.

And so, we created Cacao Bliss because, one, I wanted everyone to, one, feel themselves more, like, tap into their heart, but also have every superfood that they could get to really increase their immunity. That, instead of taking greens, if you didn’t want to do greens, you could do Cacao Bliss and have a lot of the potent superfoods right in your fingertips, but then, you also have pleasure because it’s super delicious. So that’s one of our products.

Katie: Yeah, that’s the one I’ve tried. I’ll make sure there’s a link in the show notes at wellnessmama.fm, and I’ll also post it on social the day this airs. It’s delicious. I love it. It’s like an afternoon pick-me-up for me most days, and it’s incredibly just… It’s delicious. So I love that you have created that. Where can people follow you online to learn more and stay in touch?

Danette: Yeah. The easiest way is just my website at danettemay.com. On social, it’s just TheDanetteMay.com, so whether it’s IG or Facebook. But, yeah, we’re constantly putting out content, like, I think it’s three times a week that’s free content, recipes, mindset tools, workouts on the blog as well as on social.

Katie: I love it. And you guys, those links will be in the show notes at wellnessmama.fm. So if you are driving or exercising, you can find all of them there. But, Danette, I’m so glad we finally got to connect and do this, and I just really love you and love your work.

Danette: No, thank you, it’s was so great to connect.

Katie: And thanks, as always, to all of you for listening and for sharing your time with us. We’re both so grateful that you did. And I hope that you will join me again on the next episode of “The Wellness Mama Podcast.”

If you’re enjoying these interviews, would you please take two minutes to leave a rating or review on iTunes for me? Doing this helps more people to find the podcast, which means even more moms and families could benefit from the information. I really appreciate your time, and thanks as always for listening.



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